8 replies to this topic

[Mz.Christy]

Hi,

 

I spent my life building my career. When I finally married 3 years ago I thought, no worries, we can start to have a family in 2 years. Turns out that wasn't the case. I have several things going against me:  PCOS and low ovarian reserve. I am 35 and about to start my first IVF cycle on August 5th. I am very scared and stressed.

 

To make matters worse I am being laid off from my job and I am the primary income earner in our household. I will have severance, then unemployment, and insurance for up to a year. I am used to have stable employment and love my job, but know it might be difficult to find a new job with all the doctors appointments I have. 

 

Some questions:

 

Anyone else with low ovarian reserve (mine is .49%) have success with IVF at 35?

How do you manage stress? Anyone dealt with job loss or economic disparity during this process?

 

Thanks,

 

Christy

[TryingForOur2ndChild]

First off I'm so sorry to hear of everything you are going through. Deciding to go through with fertility treatment really is a huge pill to swallow. I'm sorry that I can't answer your question about low ovarian reserve but I could maybe shed some light on the other part of your question.

I can relate to you delaying everything to focus on your career. Even though I am now 36 and married at 30 we decided to hold off for a family because I was focusing on my career which I know I would have never gotten to where I am now if I would have started a family in my early 30s. It wasn't until this time last year when I was your age that we found out about our severe male factor issues after trying for over 6 months. I was absolutely devistated and really couldn't wrap my head around the path we would probably have to take. On top of that my DHs job was somewhat unstable which it's gotten better but still not hugely stable and to add to that there has been talks of job cuts at my work in the near future.

After my DH and I exhausted all avenues on his side of things and knew our only option would be IVF with ICSI we had our first freeze all IVF cycle this past June after exploring all our options, getting all the testing done and choosing the right clinic for us. We decided to go ahead with things no matter what because like our clinic said, if we delay much longer not only will we have to tend to my DHs infertility issues which will continute to get worse but we will also have my fertility working against us. We just decided that we 'put off' having a family earlier for reasons we thought was right though I try not to think about things with regards to IF we would do anything different because I can't change the past, but I will say I didn't think twice about moving forward to ensure we didn't delay our family a second time.

No matter what only you and your DH can determine what is best for you both emotionally and financially... and it's not an easy decision. I guess you might want to ask yourself that IF you delay your treatment at what point in a job would you feel comfortable in moving forward in your treatment and would you be accepting if worst case your fertility has gotten worse. Only that is something you can answer.

To answer your stress question.... I'm naturally a high stress person and an a-type personality so I think things through which in turn can cause alot of added stress. I know what small things I have in my life that helps me unwind and destress and have made a point in ensuring I make them a part of my daily life...I know people may not understand and in fact they may think it's selfish of me to do so but the way I look at it is that I'm doing it not only for me but for my DH, our situaiton and our unborn child, so I'm already tending to my health like I would if I was pregnant.... we go through so much emotionally and financially during IVF it would be a shame not to tend to your emotional needs whenever possible during such a stressful time.

Wishing you all the best in your decision.

[dayle78]

Hey Christy and Trying! I am 36 yo and also trying for my first. After years of trying, testing and waiting to get on a list to see a specialist (there is only one clinic in my province) I am finally starting my first IVF with ICSI this August! 

 

Just started Suprefact injections yesterday and have Aug. 8th baseline to see if I am suppressed enough. Luckily I am on holidays so my first cycle will be untainted with work-stress about appointments.

 

How are things with you ladies?

[TryingForOur2ndChild]

Dayle78 - good to hear from you! Sounds like things are progressing for you which I'm sure is exciting and nerve wracking all at once. How are things going in general? Feel free to ask any questions you might have and you're always welcome to PM me.

Things are going good on this end... I'm just waiting for AF to show up so I can start with my FET. It's amazing, we pray for her to not show up and now I'm doing the opposite.... geez, the world of fertility eh..lol.

Wishing you all the best with your IVF cycle.

[dayle78]

Trying...thanks for asking! Things are great, I am on vacation and stress is a non-issue so it is the perfect time for IVF. I am reading a lot (pleasure and IVF-related of course), walking and yoga-ing! My DH took two weeks for holidays and we had a great start to July. He is back at work now and the house is quiet during the day, with only pets looking for love! So lots of baking, cooking (when it is not too hot) and of course - starting to obsessively check the message boards!

 

I will do an AF dance for you in my sunroom - although sometimes that makes it rain outside too, but oh well, my lawn needs it! :-)  How many frosties are you going to use this time if you don't mind me asking? Are there statistical differences for 3dt or 5dt with frosties? Your grades of the embies sounds wonderful!  I ask because I hope my DH and I have extra embies to freeze and if we end up with only one child in our IVF attempt (I am hopeful...:-) ) we will try aggressively for a second whenever I can cycle again.....

 

:-) have a blessed AF-inducing day!

[dayle78]

Mz. Christy - check out research on DHEA supplementation and DOR (diminished ovarian reserve). My naturopath has had success with many women trying to conceive with ovarian challenges and I took DHEA as well.

 

A great article is available in the journal Human reproduction, Vol 1.0, No. 0, pp.1-5, 2010. DHEA for poor-responder patients before and after IVF treatment improves preganancy rate.  Authors are Wiser, Gonen, Ghetler, Shavit, Berkovitz and Shulman. This is a study from Israel in which half the women got DHEA and half did not (double-blind). The DHEA group had 6 times the percentage rate of live births. Also the doctors noted the DHEA group showed improved embryo quality over time.

 

Other than a naturopath, I'm not sure where you could get DHEA properly prescribed for you. All the best!

[TryingForOur2ndChild]

Dayle78 - vacation time.... sounds great! Glad to hear you've been getting some relaxing reading and yoga in. You will so thank yourself that you've taken care of yourself emotionally as you get closer to IVF. Thanks for the AF dance.. hehe.. I may just have to threaten my uterus that I'm going to take her to get a check-up by my RE.... maybe I can scare her into cooperating...lol.

 

Go ahead and ask any questions you have.... my DH and I aren't sure yet if we will transfer 1 or 2 frosties as we are waiting on more stats from my clinic based on frozen day-3 transfer success rates with 1 vs 2 embies as well as chances of twins. We need to make a full educated decision.

Day5 embryos are typically more successful than day3's but there really is a lot of variables to consider (age of woman, quality of sperm, quality of embryo). On average they say that 50% of your fertilized embryos will die off from the time they are fertilized to day3 and then another 50% will die off from day3 to day5... for us we chose to freeze at day3 instead of having them grow out to day5.. it really is a personal choice and how you feel about it all. For us we have seen some low quality day3's be successful pregnancies so we wanted to give them a chance instead of possibly lose them, though it really is a crapshoot as we could lose them regardless. I will say we personally don't regret our decision to freeze at day3.

I'd suggest to get stats from your clinic with fresh vs. frozen transfers as well as day3 and day5 embryo successes as well as twinning rates for day3 and day5 embryos.

Enjoy getting your relaxing read on.

[Danutza]

Dear Mz Christy,

I am sooo sorry that you have to go through loosing your job now that you are looking into IVF. I can not even begin to imagine how hard that must be for you and your finances. The finances part has been a huge struggle between me and my boyfriend when it comes to IVF. He wants kids but is not ready to go into debt because of it. I , on the other hand would go up to the moon and back... I cant imagine to loose my job...

Similarly to you, I have concentrated on my career, went back to school, now I am working for govt. and doing my masters, too. Between practicum, graduate studies, full time and full time work it is hard to juggle everything. I  am in a relationship for three years after I have been divorced for 7 years. I knew I had problems with my left fallopian tube from when I was married and had a laparoscopy. The tube was closed and reopened, but we did not get pregnant. Now that I am in a new relationship after we tried for 6 months we went to get tested and investigate how were things. We did a laparoscopy after HSG and I have a blocked fallopian tube at fibrial level, lots of adhesions on left side, endometriosis, bowel stuck to my uterus, a fibroid on the uterus and low ovarian reserve. At baseline had 2 follicles on each side and with Clomid had 4 follicles on each side. The doctors thing I may have hydrosalpinx, but they can not confirm for sure. They did a laparoscopy for left tube ligation on the upper side of the tube, but when the OBGYN went in he couldn't see the left fallopian tube and saw only a bit of the left ovary which had some chocolate cysts on it. He took pictures and closed me with a referral for endometriosis specialist. The specialist, Dr . Beland looked at the pictures and said that she does not guaranty that she will be able to save the  left ovary or its blow flow if she went in to clean the adhesions. Dr. Belland, Dr. Min (Calgary Regional fertility Clinic) and Dr. Hugo (my OBGYN) recommended that I will close my left tube and right tube with doing a procedure called "Essure" when they implant a coil in the fallopian tube, transvaginally and then, the tube builds scar tissue around the coil and this way the tube gets blocked. I have no confirmation that my tubes were Hydrosalpinx, my right tube and ovary are normal, so, I decided to not do the  Essure procedure due to negative reviews of the procedure, and side effects like: coil migration, perforation and the procedure is irreversible. As I did not have any confirmation that my tubes are Hydrosalpinx from any of the laparoscopies, HSG or ultrasounds ( the liquid produced by hydrosalpinx is toxic for the embrio) I spoke with Dr. Min to do stimulation, retrieval and then at transfer see if there is any liquid in the tubes and if it isn't will do a fresh transfer, if there is liquid then froze the embryos and do the laparoscopy to clean adhesions.

 

Hope all goes well with you!

 

Cheers,

Danutza

[dayle78]

Christy - my credit cards have gotten a work out so far on my IVF journey.  In my province we get a fertility tax credit during tax time (April) but not much is covered by the provincial health care except for my injection needles and progesterone.

 

Family noticed we aren't travelling as much, so instead of gifts at birthdays and Christmas - they have taken to cash donations (I think they get the idea they are paying for future grandbabies a bit and love the thought of helping out since both my DH's sibling and my sibling have 3 and 2 kids already respectively).