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Feeling so lost after IVF loss

ivf loss drained sad frustrated lost

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#1 Beachlover

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  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Edmonton
  • Dx:PCOS
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Posted 27 August 2012 - 07:07 PM

Hi Everyone,

I am so lost and I don't know what to do - I have no answers from no one and do not know where to turn. We have been TTC for three years, we've done clomid & IUI, puregon & IUI, and now attempted IVF - which has failed. Everyone was so confident, two weeks ago I had my retrieval done and we had 45 oocytes retrieved, wednesday morning we had zero fertilize :-( they decided to do rescue ICSI and they preformed it on 30 oocytes, out of which 15 fertilized. Everything seemed to be going ok and on sunday we were down to six and by tuesday we had none.

I have no answers, the embryologist all he had to say is he is stumped and everyone else is stumped. I've been able to manage to get an appointment to speak to my doctor for tomorrow where I am hoping to get some answers. I am just so lost and confused and heartbroken, I don't know where to go, what to read, who to turn to.


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#2 gibasgirl

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  • Dx:Unexplained

Posted 27 August 2012 - 09:19 PM

Hello Beachlover,

I am so sorry and I can hear the heartache in your words. I think one of the hardest parts of this process is not having an answer, or having a promising start and ending up with an outcome that's the complete opposite.

So many of us have been there to varying degrees and it sucks. Especially in the very early days. So for now you will be stunned, and numb, and sad and not feel like yourself but know that you will start to feel better with time.

For now be gentle with yourself. Cry when you need to cry. Be still when you need to be still. Come here to vent or share with us because so many of us know what it is like. Hopefully your RE will have some answers, but be prepared because it might not be a definitive answer that is set in stone, but more of a speculation as to what could have lead to this outcome.

For now the most important thing is process the shock of the news and move forward one gentle step at a time.

You will get through this. :flowers:

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#3 Butterfli

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Posted 27 August 2012 - 09:32 PM

So sorry to hear your journey has been rough so far. It's so frustrating and I feel for you. This site has been a Gd send for me, full of support and advice. Many times I've been picked up when I was down.
Good luck on your next cycle & I hope your next step goes well :)
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Me 30 DW 34 - Two mummies to be! I'll carry my wife's egg so we can blend our family


First IVF Cycle

March 2012 Fresh - BFN

April 2012 FET- BFN

May 2012 FET- BFP - M/c6w6d icon_cry.gif


Second IVF Cycle

August 31 Fresh- th_abfp.gif

1st Beta 265 (TG) 11dp3dt

Sep 8 - 2nd Beta 8751 18dp3dt

Sep 15 - 3rd Beta - 43066 25dp3dt


babyboy.gif DS is born the 4th of May 2013 and we are so smitten!


stork-baby.gifProject Sibling stork-baby.gif

Me - 32 DW - 36 DS - 1


Second IVF Cycle

April 2014 FET - BFN 


Third IVF Cycle

July 2014 Fresh - th_abfp.gif

1st Beta 105 (TG) 9dp5dt

2nd Beta 1150 14dp5dt

Third Beta 12470 21dp5dt


babyboy.gif DS is born 7th of March 2015 and he is so precious.


stork-baby.gifProject Siblingstork-baby.gif 

Planning in 2016


Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

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