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Cranky Pants - Part two


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#26 gibasgirl

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Posted 24 May 2012 - 07:25 PM

Is that behaviour only logical to human beings with penises?

#27 sharlene

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 02:06 AM

Is that behaviour only logical to human beings with penises?


For the most part, yes! Although, DWs have their share of oddities, trust me. Spouses, you can't live with them, you, well, that's about it!
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#28 LilRabbit

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 08:52 AM

I'm on a crank roll.

So just yesterday I'm putting the remaining dinner plates into the dishwasher. My DH decides to "help" I am finishing (how sweet) and he says to me "this is a good system, we should do this all the time."

Um, you mean put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher like I always ask/remind you to do but you keep putting them in the sink anyway even after saying "yes dear?"

I especially like it when he brings a plate, cutlery and coffee mug to the dishwasher and puts the plate in the machine, and the mug and cutlery in the sink. WTH!

Yeah, great idea you came up with, DH. Maybe next week you can come up with putting your dirty clothing inside the hamper instead of beside it. Start a revolution, bb.



My DH's line is alway "They need to soak" Of course they need to soak if you leave them in the sink instead of putting them in the dishwasher right away!

----------------------

ME: 35, PCOS

HUBBY: 38, Low Motility

TTC since 2007

 

My signature is starting to get a bit crazy!!!!

IUI 2007-2008 - 4 failed IUI attempts (1 chemical)

IVF #1 FEB 2010 - Conversion from IUI to IVF.20 eggs retrieved - 2 transfered. 9 frozen - BFP

06/29 - Our little Sebastian was born, spent an hour in his parents arms, then moved on to heaven.

FET #1 NOV 2010 - Sooner than expected - Here we go again! - BFN

FET #2 DEC 2011 - Mentally I think I am ready, but are we ever really ready? - BFN

IVF #2 FEB 2012 - BFN! Again!

IVF #3 JUN 2012 - ER only - ET cancelled due to polyps. Only 1 frozen blast disapointing cycle.

IVF #4 AUG 2012 - Our last chance - BFP!

 

After the joy of learning we were pregnant - we were filled with fear as our little one was diagnosed with an Omphalocele. We have been given a 50/50 chance of carrying to term.  EDD - May 18, 2012

 

Valentines Day 2013 - Our little Cristiano is born @ 25w5d, 910g 

 

Still in the hospital....

 

 


#29 impatient

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 09:44 AM

I have to admit Posted Image ... I firmly believe in soaking ... in my household, DH is the one who actually loads and empties the dishwasher ... maybe he's on some support site right now complaining about me! LOL
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Me: 41, DH: 44
TTC: since Jan, 2008 (age 34)

DH: Low morphology, low count. Me: Stage 2-3 endometriosis, non-functional fallopian tubes, small fibroids, low AFC, low poor responder ... anything else?

Jun 2008-Sep 2011 in a nutshell: One HSG, one very traumatic office hysteroscopy, one operative laparoscopy, three fresh IVF/ICSI cycles, one chemical, one early miscarriage, two tubal recanalizations, five IUIs (3 with Clomid).

May 2010 - Aug 2011 Attempted adoption application process through the BC MCFD. Aug 2011 Signed up with a private agency. On both waiting lists as of Apr 2012. Proposal through MCFD Jul 2012. Aug 2012 - Finally ... she's home and we're a family! : )

Adoption application #2 started Aug 2013. DD2 placed May 2014, finalized Feb 2015!


"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
Thomas Edison

#30 frostedlemon

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 10:17 AM

Why is it when I'm doing stuff around the house, I'm doing my job, but when husband does it, it's considered "helping"? Why do I never get thanked the way I thank him? (I do it because I'm hoping it will encourage him to keep doing it, especially without being asked, although it never does).

Kind of like people who say Dad is "babysitting". No, it's your kid, it's called being a parent. And when you do stuff around the house, it's called doing, not helping.

Just once I want him to acknowledge everything I do and tell me he notices it and appreciates it. By leaving his stuff all over the place and rarely doing anything unless I ask, he's telling me he doesn't appreciate it at all. (I know he's not really, but that's the way it feels).
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#31 gibasgirl

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 05:47 PM

Yes. Like when a man's a chef it's a great thing, and a "man's job" and they get a gold star for that. Yeah.

The babysitting remark is interesting and I never noticed until you just pointed it out, but it's true.

#32 gibasgirl

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 05:49 PM

Well, if my DH believed in soaking that would be one thing. Or rinsing, but no. He grew up in a home where his mother did all of the domestic work. So he's used to getting up from the table after dinner because his mother would clear the table and wash everything. I'm not sure he knows what soaking is in spite of my repeated pointers.
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#33 gibasgirl

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 05:49 PM

I'm grumpy.
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#34 gibasgirl

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 05:50 PM

My DH called me at work. Asked me what I want to do tonight. I say I'm tired, I have a sore neck and just want to go home and relax. He says alright and he'll pick up wine and brie.

#35 gibasgirl

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 05:52 PM

He gets home. Tells me that he has invited a bunch of our neighbours over for drinks.

I'm not feeling social. I have a sore neck. I don't feel like tidying.

I unload the dishwasher. He watches me. I finish. He promptly puts this morning's butter knife into...wait for it... the sink.
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#36 gibasgirl

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 05:58 PM

..And, because the uterus is a homing device, he asks me where the vegetable peeler is. The one he used 2 days ago. I mentioned that he used it last and it wasn't with any of the dishes in the dishwasher, or the ones I washed by hand. He asks me again. I ask if there's a chance he brought it to the bbq. Nope. Did he, by chance, wash it? Nope.

I ask him "Is there a chance you threw it out with the organic waste?"

Pause.

"Sorry."

"Do we have any more?"

"No."

"Where did you buy it?"

ARGH!!!

For some reason my husband throws out cutlery. I bought a whole set of cutlery specifically for him to bring to work for lunch because our supply was diminishing. Then I re-stocked our "home supply."

I'm not perfect. Not by any stretch of the imagination. He's just not on my happy list today.
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#37 frostedlemon

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 06:29 PM

I unload the dishwasher. He watches me. I finish. He promptly puts this morning's butter knife into...wait for it... the sink.


I posted this in another thread, but mine will empty the dishwasher himself and then put the dishes in the sink.

Sorry you're having a rough husband day. I hope the wine will help, at least? Are you doing anything fun on the weekend?
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#38 gibasgirl

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 07:01 PM

Thanks FL. I am feeling better. My DH made dinner and I was still grumpy but he softened me up with stories from the good old days. Then my mood started to improve.

AND he put everything away and cleaned up afterwards. I had a little bit of wine and am sipping on a strawberry beer.

Grumpy GG is better. lol :)

#39 Yearning

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 09:21 PM

He gets home. Tells me that he has invited a bunch of our neighbours over for drinks.

I'm not feeling social. I have a sore neck. I don't feel like tidying.

I unload the dishwasher. He watches me. I finish. He promptly puts this morning's butter knife into...wait for it... the sink.


GG

We are married to the same man, I swear. Mine puts stuff in the sink all of the time...the dishwasher is closer to the table than the sink. However, I was sure that my DH was the only one to throw cutlery away. Most recently it was scissors and a dish cloth. Just when you are really, truly going to kill them they make you a nice dinner!!

I hope your neck is better.
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#40 staceylee

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Posted 26 May 2012 - 07:02 AM

Lol reading all this makes me feel better cause my DH does all this. He is notorious for the unloading of the dishwasher and putting stuff in the sink. He is also bad for asking me where things are. Hey where is the mayo....I look at its right in front of his face. I call it "man eyes". Now my response to his is always what do you have your "man eyes" on. He still hasn't learned to stop asking.
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ME 38 DH 37


TTC 6 Yrs
Diagnosed HIGH FSH Levels (13) Low Follicle Count placed immediately in IVF program

IVF #1 - Jan/Feb 2010 - Flare Protocol - BFN
IVF #2 - Sept/Oct 2010 - Min Stim - BFN
Going into Menopause at 34 no more biological options for me

Moving on to Adoption with Adoption Options
On the wait list - July 22, 2011

Got the Call - January 17, 2013 Baby Girl due February 11, 2013

Finally a mom - Alexis Nicole Born February 21, 2013. She is forever ours

#41 frostedlemon

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Posted 26 May 2012 - 07:46 AM

staceylee - My mom used to say, "Look with your eyes, not with your mouth" when we would do that ;)
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#42 gibasgirl

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Posted 26 May 2012 - 08:45 PM

GG

We are married to the same man, I swear. Mine puts stuff in the sink all of the time...the dishwasher is closer to the table than the sink. However, I was sure that my DH was the only one to throw cutlery away. Most recently it was scissors and a dish cloth. Just when you are really, truly going to kill them they make you a nice dinner!!

I hope your neck is better.


Well, this is news. I honestly thought my DH was the inventor (and sole practictioner) of the "throw out good cutlery" move. It's less frustrating to know that others share this frustration.

Hmm..married to the same man...Hmmm. Then maybe from this point onwards I should refer to him as "our husband" and we can share inside jokes. Does this mean we're sisterwives, or something now? lol :D

#43 gibasgirl

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Posted 26 May 2012 - 08:45 PM

And yes, my neck is MUCH better, thanks. :)

#44 gibasgirl

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Posted 26 May 2012 - 08:47 PM

I call it "man eyes". Now my response to his is always what do you have your "man eyes" on. He still hasn't learned to stop asking.


Ok, I must use this. Love it. So, so, so, true! Can I "borrow" this phrase?

#45 Yearning

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Posted 27 May 2012 - 02:46 PM

GG

We are married to the same man, I swear. Mine puts stuff in the sink all of the time...the dishwasher is closer to the table than the sink. However, I was sure that my DH was the only one to throw cutlery away. Most recently it was scissors and a dish cloth. Just when you are really, truly going to kill them they make you a nice dinner!!

I hope your neck is better.


Well, this is news. I honestly thought my DH was the inventor (and sole practictioner) of the "throw out good cutlery" move. It's less frustrating to know that others share this frustration.

Hmm..married to the same man...Hmmm. Then maybe from this point onwards I should refer to him as "our husband" and we can share inside jokes. Does this mean we're sisterwives, or something now? lol Posted Image


Hi sis,

It is really nice to know that I am not alone. Posted Image
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#46 staceylee

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Posted 27 May 2012 - 05:51 PM

Gibasgirl of course you can borrow it :)
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ME 38 DH 37


TTC 6 Yrs
Diagnosed HIGH FSH Levels (13) Low Follicle Count placed immediately in IVF program

IVF #1 - Jan/Feb 2010 - Flare Protocol - BFN
IVF #2 - Sept/Oct 2010 - Min Stim - BFN
Going into Menopause at 34 no more biological options for me

Moving on to Adoption with Adoption Options
On the wait list - July 22, 2011

Got the Call - January 17, 2013 Baby Girl due February 11, 2013

Finally a mom - Alexis Nicole Born February 21, 2013. She is forever ours

#47 LilRabbit

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Posted 27 May 2012 - 09:54 PM

Need to vent, appologies if I offend anyone with my rant. I need to be cranky and I figure this is the place to do it.

Background: A month ago my DH and I were invited to a friend's child's birthday party to be held at a Children's indoor playground. With the loss of our DS and recent failed 2nd IVF, not a good time to watch children run around all happy, especially being the only non-parent attendees. Inviting parents are very much aware of our situation and always ask "how are you." Not so much because they care, but more because they don't know what to say.

Yesterday was the birthday party, we kindly sent along a gift with a mutual friends who was bringing their kids to the party.

Today I get a text saying from the mom saying Thank you for the gift blah blah blah. Here is the rest of the conversation:

Me: Hope it fit, was not 100% on the size

Her: Fits great, she loved it. Really wish you guys could have come to the party. We don't see each other enough.

Me: Sorry, watching kids run around having fun is not my idea of fun. Sorry would not have been good company. We should get together when I return from my travels.

Her: ok.

I know I was probably a bit rude. I know that I probably didn't need to be so blunt. However, why do I feel so guilty for telling the truth about how I am doing. Why do I feel like the bad guy, when they were clearly not understanding in pushing us to attend a kids birthday party at a place I would consider hell an indoor playground.

I think I was explaining to her how I felt, looking for sympathy, instead all I get is an 'ok' Now I am home alone in tears. This sucks.

----------------------

ME: 35, PCOS

HUBBY: 38, Low Motility

TTC since 2007

 

My signature is starting to get a bit crazy!!!!

IUI 2007-2008 - 4 failed IUI attempts (1 chemical)

IVF #1 FEB 2010 - Conversion from IUI to IVF.20 eggs retrieved - 2 transfered. 9 frozen - BFP

06/29 - Our little Sebastian was born, spent an hour in his parents arms, then moved on to heaven.

FET #1 NOV 2010 - Sooner than expected - Here we go again! - BFN

FET #2 DEC 2011 - Mentally I think I am ready, but are we ever really ready? - BFN

IVF #2 FEB 2012 - BFN! Again!

IVF #3 JUN 2012 - ER only - ET cancelled due to polyps. Only 1 frozen blast disapointing cycle.

IVF #4 AUG 2012 - Our last chance - BFP!

 

After the joy of learning we were pregnant - we were filled with fear as our little one was diagnosed with an Omphalocele. We have been given a 50/50 chance of carrying to term.  EDD - May 18, 2012

 

Valentines Day 2013 - Our little Cristiano is born @ 25w5d, 910g 

 

Still in the hospital....

 

 


#48 mkttc

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Posted 28 May 2012 - 12:46 PM

LilRabit, I am really coming to the conclusion that unless you have lived it you don't get it. I think you are perfectly entitled to speak your truth about this and sometimes that is going to be blunt and people are not going to like it. I like to think that maybe her response was kind in that she might not have felt she could offer any kind of support given her position of being luckily fertile. I also have had some people in my life be complete assholes and demonstrate a real fundamental lack of understanding (and compassion) about what struggling with infertility and repeat pregnancy loss is like and those are the same people that get offended when I have not wanted to attend their damn baby shower or kid's birthday for like the past 8 years. Screw that. It isn't personal. I have several friends right now struggling with this issue and in my invite to the last party we are going to have before baby arrives I have invited them with the caveat that I completely understand if they are not up for coming out and that these events were really hard for me and that I don't take it personally and I really respect where they are at. I had a great email back from a friend who said - thanks for acknowledging that I might not to come to the party - I had been feeling guilty because I know you struggled and while I am happy for you, I am just so angry at the same time. I get that. I'd feel and have felt the exact same way. I am not sure that people who have not had this experience fully understand this...
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#49 LilRabbit

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Posted 28 May 2012 - 02:04 PM

Thanks Mkttc, I think that is all I was looking for, some sort of acknowledgement. But I guess you can't always get what you want.

Just to continue my story. My DH came back last night after fishing with the DH of this lady. She forwarded on my text to her DH. He said to my husband. "Your wife is funny." Then read him my text, followed by the comment "Is your wife down in the dumps these days." My DH responded. "Nope, why would you say that? She was just saying the truth."

I love my DH sometimes. At least I know he gets it.
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----------------------

ME: 35, PCOS

HUBBY: 38, Low Motility

TTC since 2007

 

My signature is starting to get a bit crazy!!!!

IUI 2007-2008 - 4 failed IUI attempts (1 chemical)

IVF #1 FEB 2010 - Conversion from IUI to IVF.20 eggs retrieved - 2 transfered. 9 frozen - BFP

06/29 - Our little Sebastian was born, spent an hour in his parents arms, then moved on to heaven.

FET #1 NOV 2010 - Sooner than expected - Here we go again! - BFN

FET #2 DEC 2011 - Mentally I think I am ready, but are we ever really ready? - BFN

IVF #2 FEB 2012 - BFN! Again!

IVF #3 JUN 2012 - ER only - ET cancelled due to polyps. Only 1 frozen blast disapointing cycle.

IVF #4 AUG 2012 - Our last chance - BFP!

 

After the joy of learning we were pregnant - we were filled with fear as our little one was diagnosed with an Omphalocele. We have been given a 50/50 chance of carrying to term.  EDD - May 18, 2012

 

Valentines Day 2013 - Our little Cristiano is born @ 25w5d, 910g 

 

Still in the hospital....

 

 


#50 impatient

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Posted 28 May 2012 - 02:36 PM

Wow, LR, she TOTALLY doesn't get it, does she??

Maybe she took it as an insult, as in, hanging out with kids is not fun, therefore, you wouldn't want to hang out with her and her kids. People are so dense sometimes.
Me: 41, DH: 44
TTC: since Jan, 2008 (age 34)

DH: Low morphology, low count. Me: Stage 2-3 endometriosis, non-functional fallopian tubes, small fibroids, low AFC, low poor responder ... anything else?

Jun 2008-Sep 2011 in a nutshell: One HSG, one very traumatic office hysteroscopy, one operative laparoscopy, three fresh IVF/ICSI cycles, one chemical, one early miscarriage, two tubal recanalizations, five IUIs (3 with Clomid).

May 2010 - Aug 2011 Attempted adoption application process through the BC MCFD. Aug 2011 Signed up with a private agency. On both waiting lists as of Apr 2012. Proposal through MCFD Jul 2012. Aug 2012 - Finally ... she's home and we're a family! : )

Adoption application #2 started Aug 2013. DD2 placed May 2014, finalized Feb 2015!


"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
Thomas Edison