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IVF at 43 - Does it make sense?


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#1 Arbutus

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Posted 09 March 2011 - 02:34 AM

I am 43 and trying to conceive. Other than age, there are no known factors contributing to infertility.

I completed IVF last summer (at age 42), but miscarried at 6 weeks. Other than the miscarriage I responded extremely well for my age - 17 eggs retrieved, 13 fertilized (with ICSI), and 4 made it to blasts during my first cycle. Two 5-day blasts were transferred and two 6-day blasts were frozen.

I had a FET in November with the two 6-day blasts – a 4BB and a 3BC – both thawed 100% with zero fragmentation. Despite the quality of the blasts, it resulted in a BFN. The transfer coincided with an extremely stressful time which I believe was a significant contributing factor to the negative outcome. That situation has now been resolved and my husband and I are trying to decide if we should proceed with a second IVF.

I know the odds are not in my favour at my age. Do you think it makes sense for me to try IVF again? What are my chances of success?

#2 Sweetheart

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Posted 22 March 2011 - 09:21 AM

I may be the wrong person to answer because I've continued trying at 42 even though my response was nowhere near as good as yours. Given that you got pregnant with IVF just a year ago, assuming your FSH and AFC are similar, I would definitely try again. Good luck.
TTC #1 since 04/06
Age: 45, DH: 51. TTC#1 since 04/06
2/07 First Clomid natural cycle = BFN
3/07 Second Clomid natural cycle = BFP, MC 5/07 at 8 weeks, D & C 5/07
07/07 Third clomid natural cycle= no sign of follicle but ovulation assumed by bloodwork = BFN
8/07 First Clomid + IUI cycle = BFN + complications
9/07-11/07 Unable to TTC due to recovering from injury
12/07 First Injectibles cycle (SC) (Puregon) + IUI = 1 mature follicle and a BFN
01/08 2nd Injectibles cycle (IM)(Puregon & Repronex), 2 follicles but not quite mature, IUI any way = BFN
02/08 3rd injectibles (IM) (Bravelle & Repronex), 2 follicles 21 and 14, IUI = BFN
03/08 4th injectibles (IM) (Clomid + Gonal F), 1 follicle, IUI x 4 days in a row = BFN
04/08 IVF#1 Lupron flare w/o BCP, Lupron+Bravelle+Repronex, 7 follies but only 1 matures +IUI=BFN
05/08 Break from injectibles: Femara + IUI = BFN
06/08 Break from injectibles: Femara + 1 follicle + IUI = BFN
07/08 6th injectibles: high dose gonal F: 1 follicle +IUI =BFN
08/08 IVF#2 with low dose repronex only: Surprise 3 follies, 15, 19, 21. 1 egg retrieved fertilized and Grade 1 8 cell transfered aug 19=BFN
BREAK of 6 months turned to 8: took accupuncture, lost 30 pounds, added exercise, turned 41, Day 3 FSH down from average 7 to 4, worked on marriage relationship strained from dealing with IF
05/09 IVF #3 Gonal F and menopur. 5 Follicles but none mature. Cycle canceled.
07/09 IVF #4 Known DE cycle, 10 follicles, 1 sad egg, no fertilization. WT*?
08/09 Started taking DHEA (why didn't I know of this before?)
01/10 IVF #5: Convert monitoring cycle to natural cycle IVF due to 2 mature follicles being observed on ultrasound
01/10 1 grade 1, 8 cell embryo transferred. BFN
04/10 Estrogen Priming Cycle was cancelled for some reason I forget. known DE planned
08/10 IVF #6 Estrogen Priming Cycle with massive doses of FSH = nothing = cycle canceled and told to go away.
09/10 Waiting for Known DE cycle with younger donor
12/10 Known DE backs out
02/11 IVF #7. 2 embryos, both transferred. HPT+ 8dp3dt!!!, Beta #1 14dp3dt 278, Beta #2 16dp3dt 604, Beta #3 18dp3dt 1158 (not quite doubled...), first ultrasound--> TWINS!! March 25 only one slow heartbeat. April 2 no growth, slow heartbeat, April 6 no heartbeats--miscarriage at 9 weeks. D&C.
7/11 FET #1 BFN
9/11 IVF #8 Sad looking embryos. 4 transferred on day 3. BFN. Advised to move onto surrogacy. d e v a s t a t e d and b r o k e
04/13 Adopted 2 blastocycsts: BFN. Sperm banked before DH treated for cancer..
11/13 Very last attempt. New clinic. DE. Add intralipids and viagra. 9 eggs, 5 mature, 3 fertilized, 1 made it to day 3. no surprise, BFN..
04/14 Second "very last attempt" with 4th DE IVF.
04/05/14 13 eggs eggs retrieved, 7 mature, 7 make it to blast, 2 transferred, 2 frosties, BFP!! First Beta 4/21/14 = 92; Second Beta 4/23/14 = 265; 3rd Beta 4/25 613. May 9 ultrasound, right on track 6 weeks 5 days and hb 113 bpm. .
05/13/14 bleeding. May 14 no heartbeat. May 16 D & C. Are we allowed to say F words on here?

#3 anytime now

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Posted 22 March 2011 - 08:37 PM

my RE says that the success rate calculator on IVFpredict.com is valid
The age of the eggs and not so much the quantity retrieved is the most significant factor. I too have no known issues other than age but figure that with a total of 14 transferred ivf eggs over 3 tries it's pretty clear my eggs aren't taking me far. That said, my friend had 6 ivf transfers up to age 42 with no clinical pregnancies. She quit then after a long break did one more at 43 1/2. She is carrying what the amnio says is a healthy baby againt all odds. It's possible that you may land on a good egg but the chances are expected to be very small from age 43 and up, and miscarriages are the most likely outcome if a pregnancy is achieved. Live birth rates are typically about 5%. I have a friend who only had success at age 38 on her 11th ivf. Apparently the majority of all IVF successes happen within 2 cycles with only a very few more successes on the third attempt, so if you can afford a 2nd try without depleting resources you might need should you consider donor egg, that could make sense....but personally I find it tough putting an end point on things when there is always someone out there who defies the odds. I'm expecting my bfn tomorrow and the what is next dilemma is a struggle. Ask your RE but I think the odds of success at 43 may be as or nearly as high with medicated IUIs. I think I may do one or two as my final attempts as I can't justify another 8000 for IVF at this point with my track record

Best wishes

I am 43 and trying to conceive. Other than age, there are no known factors contributing to infertility.

I completed IVF last summer (at age 42), but miscarried at 6 weeks. Other than the miscarriage I responded extremely well for my age - 17 eggs retrieved, 13 fertilized (with ICSI), and 4 made it to blasts during my first cycle. Two 5-day blasts were transferred and two 6-day blasts were frozen.

I had a FET in November with the two 6-day blasts – a 4BB and a 3BC – both thawed 100% with zero fragmentation. Despite the quality of the blasts, it resulted in a BFN. The transfer coincided with an extremely stressful time which I believe was a significant contributing factor to the negative outcome. That situation has now been resolved and my husband and I are trying to decide if we should proceed with a second IVF.

I know the odds are not in my favour at my age. Do you think it makes sense for me to try IVF again? What are my chances of success?


Me: 44 (sigh) DB is 40 (Dear boyfriend!)

TTC from March 2009-March 2011 before DB had arrived on the scene
About 9 IUIs, 3 IVFs total

2 pregnancies with 7 week miscarriage requiring D&C
2 chemical pregnancies


April 2011 began a relationship now with a wonderful guy with an 8 year old son.
Sept 2011 Natural BFP while trying not to conceive (how ironic)
First Beta Day 15 from LMP was 851, Beta 4, 19 days post ovulation 5382
7wk US showed a heartbeat of 150! 9 wk US HB 185

May 19 2012 DS is born!!

#4 Edie

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Posted 22 March 2011 - 11:19 PM

I say go for it! GO FOR IT X
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Me 45 DH 41
ttc 3 years
Unexplained
Nov 2008 IVF#1 BFN
IVF#2 Jan 09 BFN
IVF/ICSI#3 Antagonist protocol March 2009. BFP. Thank you God.
6 weeks non-viable. D&C.
IVF#4 ER Aug 09 BFN
FET # 1 BFN
IVF # 5 BFN
FET # 2 BFP
u/s # 1 a singleton, perfect measurements and heartbeat.
u/s # 2 healthy growth plus second sac sighted. 'vanishing twin syndrome'
u/s # 3 at 9 weeks - all good. Baby waved.
u/s # 4 (love those ultrasounds) 10.5 weeks Baby scratched it's ear and did the twist.
NT scan at 12 weeks two days - all good. No need for further testing. IT'S A BOY!
20 week morphology scan and all is well.
EDD August 21st 2010
Waters broke 19th Aug
Induced on Aug 20
DS born 4.29pm Aug 20, 2010
Our joy Jan 2014, DE cycle Zlin, CZ Feb 7 Beta positive

#5 anytime now

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Posted 22 March 2011 - 11:34 PM

I have no idea what the cumulative success rates are with IVF at 43 (as opposed to the chances per try). But with IUI I have an article that looks at success using frozen donor sperm (fresh might yield slightly higher success rates). 14% of women aged 43-45 will succeed in getting pregnant over 12 cycles. 11% have achieved success by the 3rrd cycle, with no further pregnancies until the 6th cycle. On cycle 6, the total cumulative live birth rate goes up to 14% and ceilings out. From cycle 6-12 there are no further successes. Food for thought as the odds for success may be just as good, at a lower cost, in this age range

The study is called Cumulative deliovery rates in different age groups after artificial insemination with donor sperm
Me: 44 (sigh) DB is 40 (Dear boyfriend!)

TTC from March 2009-March 2011 before DB had arrived on the scene
About 9 IUIs, 3 IVFs total

2 pregnancies with 7 week miscarriage requiring D&C
2 chemical pregnancies


April 2011 began a relationship now with a wonderful guy with an 8 year old son.
Sept 2011 Natural BFP while trying not to conceive (how ironic)
First Beta Day 15 from LMP was 851, Beta 4, 19 days post ovulation 5382
7wk US showed a heartbeat of 150! 9 wk US HB 185

May 19 2012 DS is born!!

#6 elsa

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Posted 23 March 2011 - 05:30 AM

Hi Arbutus!
I am 43 as well! I did 3 ivf, i chemical preg, 1 no transfer and 1 m/c. Mi RE told me that the chances of conceiving with IVF at 43 are around 5 to 10% but the miscarriage are 50%. Knewing that, i did try it 3 times! Some women do get pregnant with IVF at 43 but they are very very few! So i decided, since my goal is to have a baby, to go donor egg. 50 to 70% of LIVE pregnancy rate. For me, this does make more sense! I started the ivf at 42. I already lost 1 year with IVF, by the time i find the donor and start the potocole and do the transfer, i will be 44, if all goes well and woks the 1rst time, by the time i deliver i will be almost 45. NO more time to lose for me!!!!

But it is a very personnal decision!
Good luck!
Lilypie Maternity tickers
Me 43
Him 30
january 1992 natural pregnancy boy
september 1994 natural pregnancy boy
september 2010 IVF # 1 :
8 follicules 5 eggs retrieved 1 embryo tranfert
BFP :)))))[/b]1rst beta 30 2nd beta 13 (chemical pregnancy) :(
october 2010 IVF # 2 :
4 follicules only one retrieve tranfert cancelled embryo chromo problems
november 2010 IVF #3:
7 follicules 4 eggs retrieved 2 embryo tranfert
BFP :)))))) 1rst beta 81 2nd beta 277
january 5th: u/s baby stopped growing at 6 weeks :( micarriage at 9 weeks
july 2011 DE cycle
16 eggs retreived
13 mature
11 fertilized and divided
transfer 1 great blast july 31th
5 blast frosties
HPT 7dpast5dt : BFP :)))))))))))))))) very dark line
beta 1 august 15th 16 dpo : 647 :)
beta 2 august 17th 18 dpo: 1301 :)
1rst u/s august 30th we have a heartbeat of 122
2nd u/s september 13th heartbeat of 179
3rd u/s september 27th heartbeat 1o 177

#7 anytime now

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Posted 23 March 2011 - 06:48 AM

I conceived pretty easily and thought that once pregnant my chances of miscarrying were high but also still a 50% chance at success...but on my last cycle I was told that wasn't really a good way of looking at it and that even though I conceive my chances are still only 8-9% at a live birth as per the ivf predictor

Elsa's post is very well put and I do think that considering our potential age and whether it is a baby or biology that is more important is wise, but a highly personal decision

Hopefully all our posts are helping you in some way
Me: 44 (sigh) DB is 40 (Dear boyfriend!)

TTC from March 2009-March 2011 before DB had arrived on the scene
About 9 IUIs, 3 IVFs total

2 pregnancies with 7 week miscarriage requiring D&C
2 chemical pregnancies


April 2011 began a relationship now with a wonderful guy with an 8 year old son.
Sept 2011 Natural BFP while trying not to conceive (how ironic)
First Beta Day 15 from LMP was 851, Beta 4, 19 days post ovulation 5382
7wk US showed a heartbeat of 150! 9 wk US HB 185

May 19 2012 DS is born!!

#8 mouse

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Posted 23 March 2011 - 08:53 AM

From a general reading of IVF studies, it seems there's much of a muchness in the cummulative pattern. There is a similar bump at the 3 try stage and another at 6 tries - after that it seems pretty low. Insurance companies have seized on this as their rationalization for offering 3 tries, but there is some acknowledgement among REs that 6 tries really gives the very best kick at the can. Of course, this is for all age groups as an aggregate; I have no info at all on how it breaks down over age groups and/or specific dx.

As for stats, odds, chances etc, I've said it many times, they apply to the group and are useful for keeping expectations realistic, but shouldn't necessarily prevent anyone from giving it a shot as there's absolutely no way to truly predict how an individual will do. I don't know if it's helpful or not, but the predictor mentioned gave me just over one percent chance on my second cycle - that 1.2% chance is now 10 months old and blowing spit bubbles at me. She was conceived just weeks before my 44th birthday and the guest of honour at my 45th!
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#9 anytime now

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Posted 23 March 2011 - 10:24 AM

Hi Mouse

Can you please tell me more about the slight bump you refer to with IVF's 3-6? My RE has told me that there are countries with no limits to numbers of IVF tries and that at my age, there are not typically any successes beyond 3 tries. Given that I'm anticipating bad news on what was to be my final IVF try today,and I'm struggling to be at peace with it, I'd appreciate any info you can share.

Thanks,

A.N.
Me: 44 (sigh) DB is 40 (Dear boyfriend!)

TTC from March 2009-March 2011 before DB had arrived on the scene
About 9 IUIs, 3 IVFs total

2 pregnancies with 7 week miscarriage requiring D&C
2 chemical pregnancies


April 2011 began a relationship now with a wonderful guy with an 8 year old son.
Sept 2011 Natural BFP while trying not to conceive (how ironic)
First Beta Day 15 from LMP was 851, Beta 4, 19 days post ovulation 5382
7wk US showed a heartbeat of 150! 9 wk US HB 185

May 19 2012 DS is born!!

#10 mouse

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Posted 23 March 2011 - 11:04 AM

In the US where I'm currently living some states have mandated coverage for IVF (that is, within certain limits, insurance providers must offer IVF as part of their packages). These tend to be limited to 3 tries, because of the evidence that most users of IVF (I believe near 75%) will be successful within 3 tries. This is of course for all ages and for all causes and not specific to older women or specific conditions.

My understanding is that in other countries, where IVF is covered with fewer limitations (such as Australia), there is another 'bump' of success at the 6th cycle. Again, I think this is an overall trend - and not specific for older women or with certain dx. There was, a while ago, an NPR report on something published in the NEJM, which also addresses this:
http://www.blogher.c...=1&f=17&sc=emaf

As always, the main focus is on those under 35 as those make up the bulk of IVF users as well as those with the greatest likelihood of success at any point.
The plural of anecdote is not data.

Charity gives a meal; justice provides a place at the table.

#11 Edie

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Posted 23 March 2011 - 06:32 PM

Oh dear ladies I am really going to have to throw my 2 cents worth in here - for heaven's sake will you throw out the stats about bumps at 3 tries and 6 tries and nothing after 12 and if not by three then never!? (that has to be the worst one, my goodness!). You are doing my head in so I can't imagine what you are doing to your own! The stats are too random and insurance companies have a massive agenda, and so do governments that won't fund ivf. Mouse is right, here in Oz our doctors dont' speak about stats in the same way. I am not saying it's easy, I am just suggesting that if you are going to do ivf don't overthink the stats. Trust your instincts, remain flexible and open, find a doctor you can trust too, and take it from there.
  • Meadow likes this
Me 45 DH 41
ttc 3 years
Unexplained
Nov 2008 IVF#1 BFN
IVF#2 Jan 09 BFN
IVF/ICSI#3 Antagonist protocol March 2009. BFP. Thank you God.
6 weeks non-viable. D&C.
IVF#4 ER Aug 09 BFN
FET # 1 BFN
IVF # 5 BFN
FET # 2 BFP
u/s # 1 a singleton, perfect measurements and heartbeat.
u/s # 2 healthy growth plus second sac sighted. 'vanishing twin syndrome'
u/s # 3 at 9 weeks - all good. Baby waved.
u/s # 4 (love those ultrasounds) 10.5 weeks Baby scratched it's ear and did the twist.
NT scan at 12 weeks two days - all good. No need for further testing. IT'S A BOY!
20 week morphology scan and all is well.
EDD August 21st 2010
Waters broke 19th Aug
Induced on Aug 20
DS born 4.29pm Aug 20, 2010
Our joy Jan 2014, DE cycle Zlin, CZ Feb 7 Beta positive

#12 anytime now

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Posted 23 March 2011 - 10:35 PM

Note that today is the day I just learned of my chemical pregnancy outcome to my 3rd and final IVF, so perhaps I should not be allowed to reply today, as I'm a pretty unhappy camper. Not trying to offend anyone, but just have some strong feelings here.
I am happy that you are one of the lucky ones, Edie, and should Arbutus try, I hope she is too, but I don't think it's fair when she's asked for a reality check to simply tell her to go for it and have her expect that her chances are far greater than what they are.

If and when she decides to take the leap, at that point I agree that she shouldn't overthink it. But she specifically asked about whether it made sense to do at 43 and what the chances of success are. So she deserves information on which she can make an informed decision. Those lucky enough to succeed with IVF at 43 and up (or even 40 and up) may have a tendency towards a more rose tinted view on how many people it is successful for. And having been one of those who evidently has the typical response for her age, I can tell you that going through all of this (2 miscarriages, 2 chemicals, and no baby in the past 2 years of trying after 40) has not been a lot of fun, and there is still no sign of a baby. Donor egg would have resulted in a 60-70% chance. Sorry for the statistic. If I had thought that it was an easy thing for a child to grow up with no genetic connection to both mother AND father, I would certainly have saved myself a lot of pain and moved to Donor egg far sooner. I think it's unfair to jump into the expense, and the emotional strain for such low odds without having some idea of what one is doing. If you check out the Advanced Fertility Chicago's website, they state that they almost never see live births from IVF from women age 43 and up. In Canada, we are paying out of pocket. My RE could easily take my money and encourage me to do more IVF's. It's to their financial benefit. He has encouraged me to try my 2nd and my 3rd IVF. Just not a fourth. He most definitely has my well being at heart, so I appreciate that he is being realistic, and supportive, but not willing to encourage me to continue to put myself through something that is clearly showing indications of being a lost cause. He is in his early 60's and has seen countless women cycle over 40. He can remember all the names of his over 40's who had babies with IVF as they are few enough for him to remember.

So, while I apologize for my black mood, I don't apologize for the content. Each person has to decide what they need to do, and I will certainly cheer anyone on who has made that decision.
Me: 44 (sigh) DB is 40 (Dear boyfriend!)

TTC from March 2009-March 2011 before DB had arrived on the scene
About 9 IUIs, 3 IVFs total

2 pregnancies with 7 week miscarriage requiring D&C
2 chemical pregnancies


April 2011 began a relationship now with a wonderful guy with an 8 year old son.
Sept 2011 Natural BFP while trying not to conceive (how ironic)
First Beta Day 15 from LMP was 851, Beta 4, 19 days post ovulation 5382
7wk US showed a heartbeat of 150! 9 wk US HB 185

May 19 2012 DS is born!!

#13 Edie

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Posted 23 March 2011 - 11:02 PM

Oh dear, I hope I didn't upset you Anytime now. You have a right to feel black right now and I hope my post didn't add to your feelings. Of course it gets tougher as we get older, of course, and stats have their place too. And knowledge is power. I am sending positive vibrations your way (though I know they risk not being welcome!). Please know that I wish nothing but the best for you. Edie
Me 45 DH 41
ttc 3 years
Unexplained
Nov 2008 IVF#1 BFN
IVF#2 Jan 09 BFN
IVF/ICSI#3 Antagonist protocol March 2009. BFP. Thank you God.
6 weeks non-viable. D&C.
IVF#4 ER Aug 09 BFN
FET # 1 BFN
IVF # 5 BFN
FET # 2 BFP
u/s # 1 a singleton, perfect measurements and heartbeat.
u/s # 2 healthy growth plus second sac sighted. 'vanishing twin syndrome'
u/s # 3 at 9 weeks - all good. Baby waved.
u/s # 4 (love those ultrasounds) 10.5 weeks Baby scratched it's ear and did the twist.
NT scan at 12 weeks two days - all good. No need for further testing. IT'S A BOY!
20 week morphology scan and all is well.
EDD August 21st 2010
Waters broke 19th Aug
Induced on Aug 20
DS born 4.29pm Aug 20, 2010
Our joy Jan 2014, DE cycle Zlin, CZ Feb 7 Beta positive

#14 anytime now

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Posted 24 March 2011 - 08:20 AM

Hi Edie, the positive stuff is gladly accepted anytime. I'm glad you weren't angry with me, actually but I guess I have a strong need for anyone starting this at 43 to hear both sides. You represent the lucky side. Some get lucky. In fact 3 of my over 40 friends did this year. 2 with iui and the 43 yr old with her 9th IVF attempt. Wow it hurts to be the only one who can't and the only one who hasn't found a loving DH either. I really believed it should be able to happen for me too. I realize most people aren't single and maybe don't think about how old they'll be when their child is a certain age but by the time I manage to move away from my own eggs to something that could work, and knowing that there can be bumps and delays in that road, I think that one also needs to think about that. I was held back and still struggle accepting that my child would have no dad and would wonder about where he/she comes from both from egg and sperm side, and I worry that emotionally that could double the baggage. Were it not for that concern I'd have done DE straight away after my iuis failed. And maybe id have done medicated iuis while trying to arrange the donor cycle as the success rates are similar at 43 but not nearly so invasive. Thanks for allowing me to share
Me: 44 (sigh) DB is 40 (Dear boyfriend!)

TTC from March 2009-March 2011 before DB had arrived on the scene
About 9 IUIs, 3 IVFs total

2 pregnancies with 7 week miscarriage requiring D&C
2 chemical pregnancies


April 2011 began a relationship now with a wonderful guy with an 8 year old son.
Sept 2011 Natural BFP while trying not to conceive (how ironic)
First Beta Day 15 from LMP was 851, Beta 4, 19 days post ovulation 5382
7wk US showed a heartbeat of 150! 9 wk US HB 185

May 19 2012 DS is born!!

#15 mouse

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Posted 24 March 2011 - 08:38 AM

((AN)), I'm sure all of this is pretty raw at the mo', but I did want to say that you might be overthinking the effect of DE/DS origins on a child. Yeah, some day a snarky teen might throw something about it back in your face, but it wouldn't be too much different from the whole "I didn't ask to be born" stuff we, most of us, toss at our own parents along the way. Your child will yours because you love it and care for it and s/he will know that and that, in the end, is all that will be important. I think you can use both your singleness and the DE thing as opps for teaching your child to be strong, pursue her/his dreams, persevere, and not settle or give up just because it sometimes seems easier. Regardless of genetic content you will be one another's family - and very lucky for it!



Edie, I've said all they way along the stats are only useful for helping to ground expectations; they've no real correlation to any individual. On the contiuum, some will be super lucky, others moderately so and, sadly, some not at all. You and I and AN's 3 friends all stand somewhere amongst the lucky but unfortunately our luck is independent of anyone else's, and they are on their own. I agree insurance companies have agendas, but then again, so do many clinics ($$$), and one can not quit soon enough just as easily as quit too soon. In the end I think we have to be realistic about our expectations and then follow our hearts.

Fingers crossed for all!
The plural of anecdote is not data.

Charity gives a meal; justice provides a place at the table.

#16 elsa

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Posted 24 March 2011 - 10:27 AM

I so agree with AN. A 43 years old women needs to know what she is getting into before starting the crazy IVF fiesta :-)! I started at 42, completely not knowing what were my chances (i know, i'm stupid sometimes). Now that i know what are my chances, i will not try a 4th cycle, even if it's free here in Québec ( i did 3 but the second one did not count because there was no transfer). i am keeping this free cycle to do with DE. it's so much realistic. as for the biological thing, i personaly have 2 sons of my own and 1 adopted, the 3 of them are teens (17-19-20) and the 3 of them throw the "you don't love me" "i never asked to be born" stuff and all that sh*t when a was to strict :-)LOL!

Anyway , this is so personal!
Lilypie Maternity tickers
Me 43
Him 30
january 1992 natural pregnancy boy
september 1994 natural pregnancy boy
september 2010 IVF # 1 :
8 follicules 5 eggs retrieved 1 embryo tranfert
BFP :)))))[/b]1rst beta 30 2nd beta 13 (chemical pregnancy) :(
october 2010 IVF # 2 :
4 follicules only one retrieve tranfert cancelled embryo chromo problems
november 2010 IVF #3:
7 follicules 4 eggs retrieved 2 embryo tranfert
BFP :)))))) 1rst beta 81 2nd beta 277
january 5th: u/s baby stopped growing at 6 weeks :( micarriage at 9 weeks
july 2011 DE cycle
16 eggs retreived
13 mature
11 fertilized and divided
transfer 1 great blast july 31th
5 blast frosties
HPT 7dpast5dt : BFP :)))))))))))))))) very dark line
beta 1 august 15th 16 dpo : 647 :)
beta 2 august 17th 18 dpo: 1301 :)
1rst u/s august 30th we have a heartbeat of 122
2nd u/s september 13th heartbeat of 179
3rd u/s september 27th heartbeat 1o 177

#17 gibasgirl

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  • Interests:I like many things, music (all kinds), tennis, photography, and languages to name a few. Ok, interior and industrial design, opera, and TV. Yes, TV, there are just so many darn good TV shows on the air. Ugh, it's hard to resist.
  • Dx:Unexplained

Posted 24 March 2011 - 11:13 AM

This is a great thought-provoking thread. Thank you.

#18 ---

---
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  • Gender:Not Telling
  • Interests:recovering from pretentious nonsense
  • Dx:Unexplained

Posted 24 March 2011 - 02:52 PM

Ug..I am about to drag my 42 year old body through a FET and I hear all you ladies on what you are saying. I am realistic and yet somehow still have hope, but I wonder how I will be if this one fails again and I am faced with the decision to do another fresh or look at other options. Bloody bloody age. I don't mind getting old, I just hate that my eggs are.

This thread is making me think, and I like that I am not alone.

Stacy

#19 Edie

Edie
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  • Location:Australia
  • Interests:Having a baby.
  • Dx:Unexplained

Posted 24 March 2011 - 03:35 PM

Hey AH I am glad you don't feel too mad with me. I am also glad you are considering the DE option - I was doing the same. I had my plan B and I was determined to go for it if it didn't work with my own eggs. I do feel lucky - though at the same time boy did I work hard. Years of working for it one way or another. Seven ivf's before success. It was agony at points. Blackest of agonies. But an incredible beautiful journey too. There is a great deal to be said for determination. I know determination alone can't create an outcome, but I believe flexibility about how our dreams manifest plus determination will take you where you want to go.

In all my struggle I never ever once cursed my eggs or thought of them as old. I never ever thought of myself as 'infertile'. Not ever, and I still don't. I think the word is overused here. I think it is condemnatory and heavy. I felt so cross about how it was used here at ivf.ca I looked it up in the dictionary and I think it said something about not bearing fruit or being productive. I thought well bugger that, I am productive and I bear fruit. I might need help to pluck it from the vine but so what? I only ever thought about conception 'it just hasn't happened yet.' Not the dead end of infertility. What a word! Shall I climb down from my soapbox now? I have actually wanted to write a blog campaigning against the overuse of the word infertile, but thought I might get in too much trouble.
  • gibasgirl likes this
Me 45 DH 41
ttc 3 years
Unexplained
Nov 2008 IVF#1 BFN
IVF#2 Jan 09 BFN
IVF/ICSI#3 Antagonist protocol March 2009. BFP. Thank you God.
6 weeks non-viable. D&C.
IVF#4 ER Aug 09 BFN
FET # 1 BFN
IVF # 5 BFN
FET # 2 BFP
u/s # 1 a singleton, perfect measurements and heartbeat.
u/s # 2 healthy growth plus second sac sighted. 'vanishing twin syndrome'
u/s # 3 at 9 weeks - all good. Baby waved.
u/s # 4 (love those ultrasounds) 10.5 weeks Baby scratched it's ear and did the twist.
NT scan at 12 weeks two days - all good. No need for further testing. IT'S A BOY!
20 week morphology scan and all is well.
EDD August 21st 2010
Waters broke 19th Aug
Induced on Aug 20
DS born 4.29pm Aug 20, 2010
Our joy Jan 2014, DE cycle Zlin, CZ Feb 7 Beta positive

#20 anytime now

anytime now
  • Cyclebase
  • 2561 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Dx:Unexplained

Posted 24 March 2011 - 04:56 PM

I'll take my first moment to have a sort of laugh today. Since I cried most of the day on and off, Edie's typo made me chuckle.
In the last week, my nickname has been written up as AH (assisted hatching) and AF (no definition needed, right?) :)

It has been a good discussion here. Just not an easy topic and not easy to face the decisions...

Off to pottery to make myself cheer up!
Me: 44 (sigh) DB is 40 (Dear boyfriend!)

TTC from March 2009-March 2011 before DB had arrived on the scene
About 9 IUIs, 3 IVFs total

2 pregnancies with 7 week miscarriage requiring D&C
2 chemical pregnancies


April 2011 began a relationship now with a wonderful guy with an 8 year old son.
Sept 2011 Natural BFP while trying not to conceive (how ironic)
First Beta Day 15 from LMP was 851, Beta 4, 19 days post ovulation 5382
7wk US showed a heartbeat of 150! 9 wk US HB 185

May 19 2012 DS is born!!

#21 Dr. Glujovsky

Dr. Glujovsky
  • Just Hatched
  • 2 posts
  • Dx:N/A
  • My Clinic:www.FertilityArgentina.com

Posted 27 March 2011 - 08:25 PM

Hello! I am an RE from Argentina. I will try to give you a quick point of view (I use it a lot with my patients). Success rate is low in women of 43 years old (with own eggs, it is below 5%). Success rate with donor eggs is high (over 50%). Cost of both kind of treatments are similar, if considering all the costs - IVF, medication, donor's fees, donor's test, etc - (at least in our program).
With this information in mind, you should only try to think about your preferences and your resources (economical and psychological). If you feel that you have strong resources, you could first try with own eggs, even when success rate is low (and then go for egg donation if it doesn't work). If you feel that you are weak with the economical issue or with the emotional issue, you may start thinking of egg donation now.
I hope I could help you any way with these thoughts.

#22 bal

bal
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  • Gender:Female
  • Location:DR
  • Dx:Male Factor
  • My Clinic:Fertility and IVF Center of Miami

Posted 27 March 2011 - 10:39 PM

Great thread... really makes you think about a lot.

As my final cycle approaches, I'm starting to become confused... Is it really worth it? I mean, to go through it all again knowing that my chances are so, so slim! So much at stake! 3 failed cycles in the past year, 2 of those with 40 yr old eggs. My egg quality is def not the same as it was 4 yrs ago. With the embies created when I was 37 I got pregnant every time (chemical, baby, m/c). Now, the last 2, nothing! I'm 41 now. What are the odds of having a healthy child with my eggs and DH's sperm (primary cause of IF)? I know I'm rambling, but have been thinking about this. We want DD to have a sibling, but is it worth the risks?

Aargh! Sorry about the rant. I know I'm one of the lucky ones, and that my complaints might sound empty, but that's what's on my mind these days. The plan is set anyways...

Arbutus - I hope all these posts will help you make a decision. Devour all the information you can get your hands on, talk to your RE to death, to your DH, and if you have the financial means, the time, the strength and the will, go for it!
Me 41, DH 41
TTC - since Nov '04
2005 - TTC Naturally
2006 - IUI w/clomid x 4 - all BFN
2007
Feb - 1st appointment with RE
Lap to remove ovarian cysts
IVF #1 July - Cancelled / only 2 follicles
IVF #2 Sept - ICSI 13 / 2 transfered, 4 frosties BFP m/c 5 wks
2008
FET #1 Jan - AH 2 blasts BFP DD born Oct 2008
God, Thank You for our miracle baby!
2010
FET #2 Feb - AH 2 blasts BFP m/c twins 8wks D&C
Lap to remove ovarian cysts
Histeroscopy to remove polyp in uterus
IVF #3 Oct - ICSI 3 blasts BFN
2011
IVF #4 Jan - ICSI 4 blasts BFN
IVF #5 May - LAST!
ER May 19 - 19 eggs retrieved, 13 fertilized ICSI
ET May 24 - 3 blasts transferred - 5AA, 5AA, 4AB No frosties
HPTs since 5dp5dt -> 7dp5dt all negative
June 1st (8dp5dt / 13dpo)- HPT very faint BFP
HCG 6/2-61.33, 6/4-217, 6/5-328, 6/7-836, 6/10-2,493(22dpo)
U/S 6/20 - HR 116bpm EDD Feb 8, 2012
June 30 - SCH diagnosed - bedrest
July 25 - SCH gone! NT - 0.18cms
Aug 10 - 14 wks - Complete Placenta Previa Dx - bedrest
Aug 19 - 15 wks - No measurable amniotic fluid - bedrest
Sept 16 - DD delivered stillborn at 19w1d. RIP my angel.
Done TTC

#23 anytime now

anytime now
  • Cyclebase
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  • Gender:Female
  • Dx:Unexplained

Posted 28 March 2011 - 12:10 AM

Hi Bal,

The problem is that no one can know if you'll hit the jackpot or not, but in most cases (but not all) successes supposedly happen within 3 cycles (were all of yours fresh cycles?). And if success would come after 3 cycles, would it take 4, 6, or even 10 tries? Know one could know. This is what makes is so difficult to draw the line.
As always, it seems to come back to what can you afford emotionally and financially. I've also been told that doing more than a total of 6 medicated cycles isn't advised (this is from my sister who is an OB/Gyn. I don't know exactly why or what the REs have to say about healthy risks with repeated IVFS. But I do wonder, if there might be other ways you would actually be ok with to complete your family? Donor egg has such a high success rate, and it seems that when your eggs were younger, DH"s sperm was working well enough to get a DD for you. And, of course adoption as well.
As you know, I'm struggling with many of these decisions too. I hope that it's easier for you and DH to figure out where your hearts are at, and what feels right for you. I'll be wishing you success and happiness with whatever you choose.

A.N.

Great thread... really makes you think about a lot.

As my final cycle approaches, I'm starting to become confused... Is it really worth it? I mean, to go through it all again knowing that my chances are so, so slim! So much at stake! 3 failed cycles in the past year, 2 of those with 40 yr old eggs. My egg quality is def not the same as it was 4 yrs ago. With the embies created when I was 37 I got pregnant every time (chemical, baby, m/c). Now, the last 2, nothing! I'm 41 now. What are the odds of having a healthy child with my eggs and DH's sperm (primary cause of IF)? I know I'm rambling, but have been thinking about this. We want DD to have a sibling, but is it worth the risks?

Aargh! Sorry about the rant. I know I'm one of the lucky ones, and that my complaints might sound empty, but that's what's on my mind these days. The plan is set anyways...

Arbutus - I hope all these posts will help you make a decision. Devour all the information you can get your hands on, talk to your RE to death, to your DH, and if you have the financial means, the time, the strength and the will, go for it!


Me: 44 (sigh) DB is 40 (Dear boyfriend!)

TTC from March 2009-March 2011 before DB had arrived on the scene
About 9 IUIs, 3 IVFs total

2 pregnancies with 7 week miscarriage requiring D&C
2 chemical pregnancies


April 2011 began a relationship now with a wonderful guy with an 8 year old son.
Sept 2011 Natural BFP while trying not to conceive (how ironic)
First Beta Day 15 from LMP was 851, Beta 4, 19 days post ovulation 5382
7wk US showed a heartbeat of 150! 9 wk US HB 185

May 19 2012 DS is born!!

#24 bal

bal
  • Cyclebase
  • 1982 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:DR
  • Dx:Male Factor
  • My Clinic:Fertility and IVF Center of Miami

Posted 28 March 2011 - 01:26 PM

Hi AN - thanks for your reply. I wish you the best also! :)

Hi Bal,

The problem is that no one can know if you'll hit the jackpot or not, but in most cases (but not all) successes supposedly happen within 3 cycles (were all of yours fresh cycles?). And if success would come after 3 cycles, would it take 4, 6, or even 10 tries? Know one could know. This is what makes is so difficult to draw the line.
As always, it seems to come back to what can you afford emotionally and financially. I've also been told that doing more than a total of 6 medicated cycles isn't advised (this is from my sister who is an OB/Gyn. I don't know exactly why or what the REs have to say about healthy risks with repeated IVFS. But I do wonder, if there might be other ways you would actually be ok with to complete your family? Donor egg has such a high success rate, and it seems that when your eggs were younger, DH"s sperm was working well enough to get a DD for you. And, of course adoption as well.
As you know, I'm struggling with many of these decisions too. I hope that it's easier for you and DH to figure out where your hearts are at, and what feels right for you. I'll be wishing you success and happiness with whatever you choose.

A.N.


Me 41, DH 41
TTC - since Nov '04
2005 - TTC Naturally
2006 - IUI w/clomid x 4 - all BFN
2007
Feb - 1st appointment with RE
Lap to remove ovarian cysts
IVF #1 July - Cancelled / only 2 follicles
IVF #2 Sept - ICSI 13 / 2 transfered, 4 frosties BFP m/c 5 wks
2008
FET #1 Jan - AH 2 blasts BFP DD born Oct 2008
God, Thank You for our miracle baby!
2010
FET #2 Feb - AH 2 blasts BFP m/c twins 8wks D&C
Lap to remove ovarian cysts
Histeroscopy to remove polyp in uterus
IVF #3 Oct - ICSI 3 blasts BFN
2011
IVF #4 Jan - ICSI 4 blasts BFN
IVF #5 May - LAST!
ER May 19 - 19 eggs retrieved, 13 fertilized ICSI
ET May 24 - 3 blasts transferred - 5AA, 5AA, 4AB No frosties
HPTs since 5dp5dt -> 7dp5dt all negative
June 1st (8dp5dt / 13dpo)- HPT very faint BFP
HCG 6/2-61.33, 6/4-217, 6/5-328, 6/7-836, 6/10-2,493(22dpo)
U/S 6/20 - HR 116bpm EDD Feb 8, 2012
June 30 - SCH diagnosed - bedrest
July 25 - SCH gone! NT - 0.18cms
Aug 10 - 14 wks - Complete Placenta Previa Dx - bedrest
Aug 19 - 15 wks - No measurable amniotic fluid - bedrest
Sept 16 - DD delivered stillborn at 19w1d. RIP my angel.
Done TTC

#25 Meadow

Meadow
  • Global 100+
  • 226 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Dx:Male Factor

Posted 29 March 2011 - 08:51 PM

Can't resist throwing in my thoughts

If I knew then what I know now, I would never have tried IVF/ICSI more than once...maybe not even once!

The key is not only the stats (as a researcher I cant believe I am saying this but as a woman I have to). Information is what is important, dialogue, honesty, and real people success stories or not so successful stories. Honestly people, if REs could tell you what would be successful, that would be the holy grail of fertility treatments .... all REs aspire to find that I am sure.

So its a bit of everything I think and what you personally need to move you through this ... I think a fertility navigator would be fab myself!!

Oceania
TTC since 2005
IUI - x 5 - negative Betas
ICSI #1 - Microflare Protocol - cancelled d/t early ovulation
ICSI #2 - Long Protocol with Estrogen Priming: - 8 follies/5 eggs - 2 embryos transfered
(menses day 7dpt)
ICSI #3 - Long Protocol take #2 - 5 follies/4 eggs - none transferred
ICSI #4 - Antagonist Protocol - 4 follies/3 eggs - 2 embryos transferred
(Negative beta)
ICSI #5- Day 21 Suprefact Start Long Protocol-8 follies/2 eggs - 2 embryos transfered (Negative beta)