Something kinda funny I found online. - Inject Fun - IVF.ca Forums

Jump to content



Photo
- - - - -

Something kinda funny I found online.


  • Please log in to reply
1 reply to this topic

#1 hazypeanut

hazypeanut
  • Global 100+
  • 575 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Halifax area ( eastern passage) Military.
  • Dx:Endometriosis
  • My Clinic:Ottawa

Posted 06 March 2011 - 09:42 AM

Maybe I missed the memo that the Pregnant Fairy left on my pillow the night Tarzan impregnated me. Or maybe these are lessons that every pregnant girl has to learn the hard way. Either way, itís been one heck of a learning curve at times! And thatís why today I bring to you my 35 shocking facts 18 weeks of pregnancy has taught me. So letís dive in!

1. Iíve seem to have sprung a vagina leak. The thoughts of wearing grandma underwear and panty liners 24/7 dance around to the tune, ďDonít go chasing waterfallsĒ in my head. Is it really necessary that almost every hole I have should leak? Thatís just not fun.

2. Veins are popping out of boobs like crazy. Like you can trace my vein on my boob with your finger crazy. Either my boobs are working out and lifting weights while I sleep or theyíre going to be some incredible 24/7 milk producing machines. At this rate, Iíll have one happy, satisfied, and full baby boy.

3. Hygiene seriously lacks. Sometimes Iím so tired that I donít wash my face before I go to bed at night. Sometimes, like today, I donít brush my teeth until 2:24 pm. Sometimes I have greasy hair. Sometimes I only shave because I canít stand how long the hair on my legs has gotten. As gross as all of these things are, Iím (sadly) perfectly ok with it.

4. I pee a ridiculous amount of times per day. I pee more in a day now than I peed in an entire week all together. Our water bill has increased ten-fold because of all the flushing going on around here. One of my bad habits is to go to the bathroom and then tell Tarzan that we are out of toilet paper. He hates it.

5. Not only is my belly growing, but so is everything else. My arms, butt, thighs, and body parts I didnít even know I had are getting bigger by the day. This cannot be a good thing.

6. Hormones are beyond out of control. Just ask my husband Tarzan.

7. I cry about everything. I cry over commercials. I cry over TV shows. I cry over seeing someone do something nice for an elderly woman at the grocery store. And I cry over the fact that I cry so much. Iíve officially become lame.

8. Forgetfulness flows through me like the sand through an hour glass. The days of my life can be summed up in two words: Pregnant Brain. I had something funny to also write here, but I forgot what it was.

9. Sex. Oh yeah. Although Iíd love to say that since becoming pregnant, sex is hot, steamy, incredible, and frequent, sadly it happens about as often as sequels are released for the movie Titanic.

10. Laziness has become my middle name. But so has sleep, nap, do-nothing, relax, and chill out.

11. Food has become an obsession. I swear that Taco Bell and McDonaldís are making commercials just for me. And no matter how much I eat, Iím always hungry again 30 minutes later. Sorta reminds of of eating sushi pre-pregnancy.

12. Social life. What social life? That went out the window shortly after getting pregnant and Iím often asleep on the couch by 8:30 and in bed by 9:00Ö Friday and Saturday nights included.

13. My constant sneezing has become a way for Tarzan to keep track of where I am in the house at all times. And this isnít the cute sneeze like I used to have. Oh no, this sneeze is extremely loud and itís best to have a kleenex on hand for the huge amount of snot that flows out of my nose.

14. Everything has a smell. I can smell the tile, Tarzan, the garbage in the kitchen, our dog, our couch, the TV, and the flowers in the other room all at the same time. Iíd either make a great super-sniffing super hero or I could replace a few drug-sniffing dogs police use.

15. Bitchiness. Donít mess with me. My hormones are ready to go into battle at a moments noticeÖ and I never lose. Really.

16. My dog is attached to me like a cell phone on a 15 year-old that loves to text. She must be next to me at all times now. Too bad she wonít hop in the shower with me though, she could use a bath soon.

17. Even though I am growing a baby, I still donít like the fact that Iím gaining weight in other spots than my stomach. Why didnít I luck out with one of those awesome bodies that doesnít gain weight so easily? Damn genes.

18. Google isnít always a pregnant girlís friend. I canít tell you how many times Iíve looked something up and based on what I read Iíd swear I was either going into labor or that I had a rare disease only found in red frogs in the Amazon jungle. No joke.

19. Most maternity clothes are as flattering as me wearing a Snuggie everywhere I go.

20. Fitted pregnancy shirts seem to work better than the flowy kind. At least you can tell Iím pregnant and not just really fat. And this is ALWAYS a plus.

21. Pimples suck. What am I, a teenager again? Well, shoot, even as a teenager I never had acne. Pimples and pregnancy seem to go hand in hand for a lot of us. Who would have known that pimples could grow into your hairline and on your head?

22. People want to touch my belly, even though itís not a huge bump yetÖ and I do not like this. My belly is my belly. Your ass is your ass. Just because you have a bubble there doesnít mean everyone who walks by can touch it. Hands off my bump!

23. I get into fights over nothing sometimes with Tarzan Ė over stupid things. If he forgets to put a new trash bag in the trashcan after taking it out, God help him. Heís in for a pregnant woman hormone outburst like heís never seen.

24. People are extremely noisy. I know that they care for the most part, but I donít care about your advice, your name choices, or how it was 20 years ago when you were pregnant. If I wanted to know what it was like, Iíd ask you. And for Godís sake, the last thing I want to hear about is how you were in labor for 30 hours and you wanted to die. Or how you pooped on the table. Or how you tore so badly. Or how your baby had problems. Or how sex is just not the same. Or that the epidural didnít work. Yea. Thanks for telling me that. Bitch.

25. Now that Iím pregnant, other pregnant women feel itís OK to talk to me about their dark nipples or leaky vaginas. And for some strange reason this keeps happening over lunch or dinner. True story. The last thing I want to be thinking about while pouring gravy on my mashed potatoes is your leaky vagina thankyouverymuch.

26. Itís easy to make friends in dressing room hallways with others who are trying on maternity clothes. We have this new common bond. Itís like weíre all meant to be BFFís to bond over how awful some maternity clothes can be.

27. Wearing fun heels is still do-able, but I know it will become all but a distant memory soon enough. I donít know what it is about being pregnant and my feet being different. The same heels I wore pre-pregnancy that fit my foot just fine then, make my feet hurt like hell every time I wear them now!

28. Dreams while pregnant can get a little wild at times ranging from nightmares, to puppies, to normal sex, to bisexual sex (for the record, Iím a straight girl)

29. Migraines. Enough said.

30. I get out of breath doing just about anything now. Stairs? Forget about them. Show me the nearest elevator. What? No elevator? Carry me.

31. The wonderful sneeze and pee. Itís bad enough that Iím sneezing all the time now, but to have to worry about some pee escaping each time I do, is truly something Iíd rather live without.

32. My areolae have begun their attack on my boobs. At this rate, I fear that my entire body is slowly turning into one big nipple.

33. Nausea and morning sickness are far worse than what ďtheyĒ tell you itís like. I compare it to having the worst hangover youíve ever had and feeling like that for 24-48 hours at times. And then waking up the next day and starting all over againÖ and againÖ and againÖ

34. My pregnancy gas is unlike anything Iíve ever experienced. Itís frequent and according to Tarzan, studies should be done on a pregnant womanís gas as it may be an effective weapon to fight wars and crime.

35. Finally, the infamous pregnancy glow that you hear about is a bunch of bullsh!t. It hasnít happened yet and I seriously have doubts that it ever will happen. Seriously. At this rate the only thing that will be glowing on me is my stomach when the light hits it just right because my skin will be stretched out as far as it can go!
  • Laura1976 likes this

1997 July.. DD born, from a previous relationship. Born on her due date.

2006 Oct, Married my best friend.
2007 Oct, Journey to conception starts( although in the 8 yrs we have been together we have never used BC)
2007 July 14th Hubby leaves for Afghanistan for 2 months.
2007 Oct, hubby leaves again for Afghanistan
2008 Jan 1st, Hubby returns
2008 Jan, blocked tube on left and removal of baseball sized cyst on rt ovary
2008 April started on clomid for 6 months
Referred to Dr. Ried in Kingston, more tests show no tube blockage. But does show stage 4 endo.
IUI # 1 BFN
IUI # 2 BFN
3rd cycle cancelled due to not responding to meds very well.
Referred to Dr. Min at the OFC

IVF #1

June 1st consent signing
Baseline ultrasound revealed 16 follicles, and FSH of 7! previous day 3 had shown 9 and high estrogen levels.
June 29th 2010 Education session, done...hurry up day one!
Aug 10th Called in Day #1
Aug 15th-sept 4th Start BCP
Aug 25th started suprefact
Sept 10 bw
Sept 11 Started puregon 350 u
Sept 15th first us.
Sept 18th second us and bw.. a bunch of small follicles.. and 4 measurable ones cycle maybe cancelled.
Sept 19th 3rd ultrasound ... 18 follicles and 8! good sized follicles. Cycle is back on..and 2 surprise follicles on the right!!!
Sept 20th us and bw.
Sept 21 bw and us DAY 11
Sept 22 bw and us.. ready for trigger tonight! 8 good follies, one at 20 the rest following suit.
Sept 24 ER..7 follicles harvested, 6 eggs retrieved.
Sept 25 call from lab, 4 eggs Mature, 3 eggs fertilized. Can't believe we have made it this far!
We are in love with our embryos!! GROW EMBIES GROW!!!!!!
Sept 27 Transfered 2 sweet little embryos.. one 7 cell the other an 8, on day 3. Sadly none to freeze
Oct 12 is BETA day!! im PUPO until then! Still waiting on blood results..
Couldnt take it any more and POAS..
BETA #1 700.
Ultrasound Oct 27th.
BFP!!!!!!!! OMG! ))
Nov 26th First OB appt. Couldnt find heartbeat, still early? 86.5 kg.
Dec 2nd bought doppler heard heartbeat and fell in love again.
Dec 16th ultrasound.
Dec 22nd 2nd OB appt. Heard heartbeat, such music :)88.5 kg.
Jan 21st 3rd OB appt. 89.2 kg
Feb 9th anatomy scan and sex of baby!!!
ITS A GIRL!!! YAY!
Feb 23 OB appt.. 91.1 kg Placenta completely covering cervix.
Mar 25 OB appt.. 94.3 kg
Apr 06 OB appt..
Apr 12 U/S to check placenta and cervix.
May 3rd OB talked about having C section no later than 37 weeks if placenta in same position.. oh my! thats 3 weeks!
May 6th U/S to check placenta..tech says its the same as they have been telling the doc all along..i assume its still covering.. will find out wed at OB appt.
Scheduled C section May 24th, 2011

Baby girl Madeleine was born weighing 4 lbs 11 oz.

 

IN THE PROCESS OF STARTING ANOTHER FRESH CYCLE....YAY!!

Second fresh IVF failed. :(


#2 Laura1976

Laura1976
  • Super Moderator
  • 3356 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Winnipeg
  • Interests:I think right about now all I am interested in is getting PG and staying that way for 9 months!
  • Dx:Immunological
  • My Clinic:Heartland (IVF #1) VFC (IVF #2)

Posted 06 March 2011 - 10:28 AM

Thanks for posting that, it was cute! I can't wait to hand that to my SO as a manual ;-)
ME 35 SO 32 TTC #1 since September 2008

See 'About me Page' for more cycle history

November 29/11 - Unexplained IF/Recurrent loss testing

Compliment C3 & C4 below acceptable range
LA Ratio DRVVT above acceptable range
Lupus Inhibitor demonstrated
Antiphospholipid IgG above acceptable range
Antiphospholipid IgM above acceptable range (more than double)


Consultation @ VFC December 10/11

IVF/ICSI #2 (with Intralipid therapy) January/February (Victoria Fertility Clinic)
BCP December 16 -29/11 & January 6 - 28/12
Vitamin D (2000iu daily) and Iron Supplement (Ferrous Gluconate 300mg daily) - Start December 24 until Dr advises otherwise, PregVit 5 (Starting January 12/11), Vitamin E (800iu daily) until Heparin begins (Starting January 14/11) Fish Oil (1200iu daily)
Superfact (0.5mg) - Start January 22/12
Dexamethasone (0.5mg) - Start February 4/12 until beta

After ER - Doxycycline (100mg), Estrance (2mg), Prometrium (200mg 3x day), heparin 5000 units (2x day), calcium (1500mg daily), low dose aspirin (81mg daily)
Intralipids - February 13/12 and day of ET
Neupogen Uterine Flush - Day of ER

February 2/12 - E2 35p/mol
February 4/12 - 300iu Gonal-F & 75iu Repronex
February 9/12 - U/S & E2 - RIGHT- 11, 9, 10, 19, 8, 12, 11, 10, 13, 6 LEFT: 12, 7, 10, 10, 8, 6, 5, 5 E2 2635

February 9/12 Gonal-F lowered to 225iu Repronex remains at 75iu
February 11/12 - U/S & E2 - Right 14, 10, 11, 12, 10, 13, 12, 12, 14, 7 LEFT: 11, 8, 10, 13, 9, 8, 8 E2 5610
February 13/12 - U/S an E2??? & Intralipid Therapy
February 16/12 - E/R 20 eggs, 17 mature and ICSI'ed, 3 left to fertilize by regular IVF
February 17/12 - Fert Report 16 fertilized by ICSI, 1 fertilized by IVF
February 20/12 - Neupogen injection
February 21/12 - Transferred 2 Blastocysts ( 1 x Grade 19 Early Blast, 1 x Grade 19 Expanded Blast) and Intralipid Therapy and Acupuncture

“Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.” - George Carlin