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One of the best I've heard

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#1 babatime



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  • Gender:Female
  • Location:calgary
  • Interests:Having a Baby, gardening, reading, cooking, sewing, drawing, camping,
  • Dx:Unexplained
  • My Clinic:Foothills

Posted 24 June 2009 - 01:52 AM

An Alberta cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous
pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud
towards him.

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban
sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I
tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you
give me a calf?

The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects
it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the
Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an
exact fix on his location, which he then feeds to another NASA satellite
that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and
exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has
been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL
database through an ODBC connected Excel Spreadsheet with email on his
Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized
HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have
exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused
as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what
your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

"You're a member of parliament for the Canadian Government", says the

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even
though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already
knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much
smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows...this is a
herd of sheep.

Now give me back my dog
  • tannikka likes this
Me 42 DH 39
5 Years Unexplained
IUI x 2 with clomid feb, march 2009 BFN
IVF # 1 Jun/July 2009, BFN
IVF#2 November/December 2009 BFN
FET # 1 Feb/March BFP

Lily Annabelle born on September 26th at 11:48 am at 29 weeks gestation. Welcome to the world my little angel.
David Lucca born on September 26th at 12:47 pm at 29 weeks gestation. Welcome to the world my little angel.

#2 tryinghard

  • Member
  • 108 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Oshawa,Ontario
  • Dx:Tubal
  • My Clinic:Hannam, toronto

Posted 06 October 2011 - 10:26 AM

OMG LOLPosted Image Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image
Me (39), DH (45)
married for 15 years
TTC for 14
several failed IUI's
2 ectopic = one tube gone and one is blocked

IVF#1 ( part 1 )
cancelled on 4th sep. 2011 due to poor response

IVF#1 ( part 2 )
cancelled on 28th sep. 2011 due to poor response

IVF#1 ( part 3 )
followup with RE on 20th oct. 2011 .... waiting

#3 Tracy1234

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  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Grande Prairie, Alberta
  • Interests:Playing in the dirt aka gardening, my big hairy four legged kid and also the 3 three smaller ones, too! I love to cook and bake, but am trying to cook and bake low cal these days :D
  • Dx:Unexplained
  • My Clinic:VFC

Posted 06 October 2011 - 01:43 PM

HAAAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Thanks for posting this, too funny!!
Me 35 DH 32

Started TTC 2008
Unexplained...doesn't that just mean "we don't know!!"
July 2009 BFP naturally, ended in m/c

Edmonton fertility center
Tried clomid for 3 months
IUI with clomid 2009 - BFN
1st IVF
June 2010 - BFP - Miscarriage
High progesterone levels pre ET is thought to be the hang up :(
Found out I've got a low ovarian reserve due to childhood illness - ITP
2nd IVF
Short protocol, menopur, orgalutron, no suppression
Our RE tells us it's time to move on

Genetic testing - normal
Suprefact, dexamethasone, Gonal F, Luveris, estrogen, etc.
BFFN - Yep, that's an extra F, guess what it stands for? :D

Natural OMG!!
June 6th 13dpo beta 226
June 8th beta 446
July 26th u/s 144bpm measuring a couple days behind
August 12th u/s 165bpm measuring right on time!

#4 Yearning

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  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Calgary
  • Interests:Horses, Show Jumping, Reading, Chemistry, Genetics, Math.
  • Dx:Male Factor
  • My Clinic:Foothills

Posted 30 November 2011 - 03:39 AM

LOL...This one is really great! You can tell it anywhere.

#5 odyssey

  • Global 100+
  • 117 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Toronto, ON
  • Dx:Unexplained

Posted 30 November 2011 - 07:45 AM

Heard a different version before..but this one is funnier Posted Image