Posted 26 February 2019 - 04:21 PM
I don't have an answer for you, but I just wanted to let you know that I am also struggling with whether to continue treatments or not, so know that you you are not alone. I have done 5 unsuccessful rounds of IVF so far and I am currently in an FET cycle with embryos that came from cycle 4. I may have given up after cycle 4, except that it was so monumentally better than my first 3, that I convinced myself I needed to squeeze every little chance of a good blastocyst out of me before I turn 40 or beyond.
I don't know what it is like to have kids, and to balance your expectations/needs and desires against theirs; that must be difficult - you're very strong to be where you are in the first place.
My decision making for myself is starting to sound something like this: "Do what you need to do, and can reasonable manage emotionally and financially so that at the end of it, when this hellish infertility nightmare is over (if indeed it ever is truly over), I can say I actually tried my best and did what I could. I don't regret it."
38 39 DH: 4 1 43 TTC Since 2014
Miscarriage in April 2016 (natural pregnancy)
Many IUIs 2017 - One BFP! - Chemical Pregnancy
IVF #1 August 2017 - antagonost protocol - 11 eggs retrieved, 6 fertilised w/ICSI. 2 embryos to transfer day 5 - BFN - nothing to freeze
IVF #2 - November 2017 - flare protocol - 7 eggs retrieved, 4 fertilised w/ICSI. 2 morulas (not quite blasts) to transfer day 5 - BFN - nothing to freeze
IVF #3 - April 2018 - DHEA priming - 10 retrieved, 7 mature, 7 fertilised w/ICSI. 2 morulas to transfer day 5 - BFN - nothing to freeze.
IVF #4 August-September 2018 - 17 eggs retrieved, 12 fertilised w/ICSI. 4 blasts (2 transferred day 5: 4AB and 2AA. 2 Day-6 frozen) BFP!! Beta #1= 39, Beta #2 = 105, Beta #3 = 210, Beta #4 = 20. Early Miscarriage.
IVF #5 January 2019 - 7 eggs retrieved, 3 mature, 2 fertilised. Day 3 transfer of one 9-cell embryo: BFN. Worst cycle ever?
FET: March 2019 - BFN.
What...wait...what? April 2019 SURPRISE NATURAL BFP!! Early miscarriage @ 6wk. W the actual F?
IVF #6 - August 2019 -BFN
Moving on to DE IVF abroad
DE IVF #1 - 2 blasts transferred, chemical
DE FET #1 - 2 blasts transferred, BFP! Amazing betas (170 - 40K) then bleeding then haemmorage at 6.5 weeks. ER and then hospital stay. Not great. Not great at all.
DE FET #2 - 1 blast transferred - BFN
Will this ever work? Losing hope, steam, money.