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dd's Concern

Posted by kookacola , 23 August 2013 · 1225 views

A months ago or so I had a sore removed and it was sent away.  The result cam back as cancarious.  Then my gp wanted to open up the wond one more time and make sure he got all of it.  Honestly, the second time was much more painful and a bigger wound because he took more tissue out.  Ever since then dd is very worried about me, she's 3.  Last week my friend took dd for a playdate and she kept asking if my head was going to be ok and would I be ok and was I coming back? I haven't told a lot of people about my disgnosis and feel it's best to keep it that way.  So, next week dd and I will be visiting my mom and I'm worried she'll say something to my mom that I had a owie on my head and will I be ok? Am I coming back.  I've chosen NOT to tell many people for a list of reasons.  I particulatly decided not to tell my mom because we're not close, she's so judgmental.  She's so much so that when I was going through my ivf cycle she kept pushing me to consider "childlessness" nice hey? So I don't know how keep things normal and dd not try and worry.  I was suprised how concerned dd is about this and I did ask my gp about it and he says it's normal for them to be this way.  My mother on the other hand and is someone I sadly can say I don't trust anymore.   




So sorry you are going through this.  Maybe try talking to DD to reassure her. 

Thank you Smc :) It's been a rollercoaster but I'm not sure how I can reassure a 3 year old.  I keep my worries in check so she can't pick up on them. 

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CathySchwenning
Aug 25 2013 12:42 AM
I am so sorry you are going through this. They say that kids are very intuitive and can feel / sense emotions. She may even sense that it is a secret from your Mother..? Thinking of you
    • kookacola likes this

I haven't said anything to my mom and feel it's best not to.  I don't want my mother or my sister for that matter to know.  Maybe it's selfish but I'd reather keep it low key and not tell many people about it. 

Kids are smarter then we give them credit for. Try explaining to your DD just before you go that this is your little secret and she can't tell anyone. It's for you and her only. As stupid as it may sound, make it your thing (the both of you). Reassuring her will be hard, but you can do it. I've had situations in the past where I didn't want anyone to know (except my dd knew) and by telling her it was our secret, for us to share, it helped. She never told anything to another soul to this day (and she's 10 now) 

    • kookacola and Red Wine like this

Sorry to hear about your situation kookacola.  Kids are so smart, but hopefully your visit with your mother goes well.

 

Big hugs.

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