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What to do next?

Posted by jennymarie , 13 August 2010 · 633 views

The results are in from our second attempt at IVF/ICSI.  Once again, our beta came back a BNF.  Once again we are devastated, heartbroken, hopeless…you all know those feelings.  Our dream of having our own biological children is slipping farther and farther away from us…many of you know that feeling as well.  I just can’t believe this is our life…I’m sure...


Setback #1

Posted by jennymarie , 16 July 2010 · 429 views

So today I went for my day 0 u/s and b/w, bought my first Gonal-F pen of the cycle and headed on my merry way.  Before I left, the nurse reminded me that if I didn't hear back from the clinic by 4, then I was all set to start my stims tonight.  I never thought I would hear back from them, because I never had any issues with my bloodwork.  I was excite...


When it rains, it pours...

Posted by jennymarie , 14 July 2010 · 770 views

As I've mentioned in my last entry, my SIL is pregnant.  We were initially devastated, hurt and angry all at once.  They were upset that we did not respond (over speaker phone) the way that they had hoped.  The announcement was followed by 4 days of unanswered phone calls from my SIL and MIL (my husband refused to answer the phone).  Finally, on the 5...


How should I feel?

Posted by jennymarie , 24 June 2010 · 1048 views

Today my SIL called to say that she and her DH are expecting their first child.  She got us on speaker phone to tell us the news and it every ounce of energy I had to utter a rather pathetic "Congratulations" before exiting the room (at which point my DH quickly switched off of speaker phone).  I went immediately into the bedroom and began to cry....


My Lesson in Compassion

Posted by jennymarie , 11 June 2010 · 433 views

I've recently had a lesson in compassion.  It did not come quickly or easily.  It came from a great deal of self-reflection, the kind that requires you to work through anger and hurt and find that place where you can put yourself in someone else's shoes.  It all began nicely enough - well, sort of.  I was at a Relay for Life with my husband, siste...


Hi! I'm Jennymarie and I'm battling infertility...

Posted by jennymarie , 09 June 2010 · 572 views

At this very moment I'm feeling very anxious.  I'm feeling this way for a number of reasons.  Firstly, this is the first time I'm going public with our otherwise private battle (even if it is under the guise of anonymity).  Secondly, I don't think I have ever said to anyone, not even myself, that my DH and I are struggling with infertility...

Our Journey So Far

Me 32 DH 30
Diagnosis MF

July /08 Begin TTC
June /09 Referred to IF clinic
Oct. /09 IUI/clomid
Nov. /09 IUI/clomid

Dec. /09 Long Protocol for IVF
Jan. /10 ER
Jan. /10 ET - 2 embies( 1 - 8 cell, 1 - 7 cell) 3dpt
Feb. 16/10 BFN

May 7 /10 Laparoscopy

June 11/10 Day 3 u/s

June 29/10 Began Suprefact (long protocol)
July 12/10 AF arrived
July 16/10 Day 0 u/s, b/w & begin Gonal F 225
July 27/10 ER 8 eggs, 7 mature, 5 fertilized
July 30/10 ET - 2 embryos (1 8 cell grade 1, 1 8 cell grade 2 compacting)
Aug. 12/10 BNF

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