5 replies to this topic

[babysunshine]

Hello
We are in the fertilization process using donor eggs after a long journey. Other than nothing fertilizing my biggest fear is too many fertilizing. It causes me so much pain the thought of disposing of these embryos. I won't do it. I struggle with the idea of sharing our embryos but when I think about a family in need and so much to give I realize my heart may be big enough. It's a hard decision and I just want to be prepared ahead of time how to do this.

Can embryos using DOnor eggs be donated? It was a know donation and we have her medical info .

Can anyone share their journey either donating or accepting of embryos? I would Be so grateful. I am really struggling with this.

I know that finding a deserving family of a embryo would be easy as after going thru infertility connects us all in a way. I know that the baby would be so wanted and so incrediably loved.

What does the process entail? The steps?


Sincerely
Babysunshine

[silverbrumby]

Hello,

 

Firstly, to answer your question, absolutely can embryos from a donor egg cycle be donated. 

 

I am a recipient of donated embryos and I have twins through that donation.  I am blessed to have an open donation so we are able to know our donor family and have become quite close with them.  

 

Around the same time I found out I was expecting twins, a friend in my infertility forum lost her pregnancy at 28 weeks.  I spoke with my donor family and we agreed to donate some of the embryos to her as well, so there are three families connected through their gift.  

 

I am currently in the process of trying to find a donor family so we can have at least one more.  I found a donor last Summer but sadly the transfer ended in miscarriage.  That too was an open donation and even though I miscarried we are still close and have an amazing story.  

 

 

Embryo donation is an amazing gift.  It is a very difficult and personal choice but if it is something you choose to do then it can be life altering for another family and also brings tremendous joy.  It's unchartered territory in terms of the journey but more and more of us are building families this way.

 

There are many different ways to donate, depending on what you are looking for (e.g. open donation, private, anonymous, agency donation).  

 

I also run a group on facebook called Embryo Donation that offers information, support and resources (including the chance to meet and match with recipients/donors) to donors, recipients and those considering this path.  Feel free to request to join and I can introduce you.  My donors are in the group as well!

 

https://www.facebook...87402248016218/

 

I will also send you a PM and would be happy to chat with you more.

 

All the best!

[GraceM]

I think it is good to research but there is no need to make a decision now.   I hope that your donor eggs fertilize and that you use as many as you need and have some left over but you may not. Or, if you wait a few years until after you think your family is complete, you may actually decide to use them.  

 

I went through this process wondering what to do with our few embryos.  I even posted about it last year wondering what I should do.  To make a long story short, circumstances have changed and now I plan to use those embryos and our RE wants us to do another cycle to get more because he feels they won't be enough!

 

And even if you are done, there is no rush to do anything until you and DH are ready.  

 

There are many wonderful options from donation to research.   But don't be in a rush to decide or execute on a decision until you are really, really sure you are done and you are emotionally ready to let go.   

 

I think you would also need to check with your clinic/lawyer to know if you can donate the embryos.  It depends what the contract and consents say.  

 

If you want a known donation, you may need to go through a lawyer.  Sherry Levitan is a great person to call and very experienced.  I am sure she would be happy to talk to you now (she normally does a free phone consult).

[nervus optimist]

My husband and I are parents thanks to the gift of donor embryos! You are 200% right about him being so so so wanted, and so so so loved. We are grateful every minute of every day that he is here.

 

In our case the donation was anonymous through our clinic. Truthfully I would have preferred some openness but our clinic doesn't have that as an option. 

 

As others have said there are several different avenues that you can choose for the donation process. All are free for you as the donor. You can choose how much openness you'd like to have. If you want to choose the recipient couple or meet them or keep everything at arms length.

 

I think as other have said it is probably a good idea to ask a lawyer about donating embryos from an egg donor, but my understanding is that if the eggs were donated to you they are yours. That being said, it is probably a good idea since it is a known donor, to have that conversation with the donor before finalizing your decision, more as a courtesy than a legal obligation.

 

I second having a conversation with Sherry Levitan. I called her when we were first learning about the process and found it extremely helpful. In the end since our donation was through our clinic we didn't have to use a lawyer for any part of it, but I'm grateful to have had the consult.

 

I also agree as others have said that it is a good idea to have the conversation but there are a lot of things that still need to happen before you get to that point. I was so sure on my first cycle that I'd have lots to freeze and I'd never have to do a second fresh cycle.... clearly I was very very wrong. 

 

Wishing you much success in your upcoming cycle!

 

[EverHopefull!]

We looked into this too and our understanding was that once the donor signs the legal papers those eggs belong to you and you can do what you want with them.  If it was a known donation you might want to talk to your donor about it, but you're not obligated to. 

 

We asked if we could only fertilize half of them and freeze the other half, just in case we found ourselves in the same situation.  We didn't get as far as you (yet) so we dropped the question, but it might be worth asking Dr. H. 

 

And yay that you're there!  That's super exciting news!  Good luck!

[DQC]

The egg donor will have to agree to donate the spare embryos. I am the mom of a beautiful boy thanks to an egg donor. All 3 of us had to decide together what to do in case there was a surplus of embryos. We decided to donate them to another couple.

 

At the end, we used them all. We want another baby and used the last 2 embryos, but we only got a m/c and a negative. Now, we are looking for donated embryos ourselves! Unfortunately, although they have that option in the forms, my clinic doesn't have a donor embryo program. I would really want to know what do they do with the embryos of the couples who, like us, decided to donate them to other couples in need...

 

@Silverbrumby, I've requested to join your FB group.