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#1 Diemtee

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 06:29 PM

Hi! I've been thinking for a while about getting a dog... I feel like I'm going crazy with the waiting (waiting for a lap surgery, no idea when it's going to happen) and I just want to love and take care of another being. The only thing that's stopping me right now is the fear of the expenses incurred by getting a puppy. That and... What if having a dog creates added stress in my life?
Has anyone here gotten a dog as a way of coping with infertility? Now please don't bite my head off, I realize that the dog is not a quick fix to my problem - It would be cruel to get a dog for the hard times and then ignore it once pregnant. I just want to know if anyone has the same yearning as me...

#2 ilovemydogs

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 07:07 PM

We got our dog as soon as we started living together, a year before TTC. However, I think he is way more spoiled than he would be if we had been successful. He really does make life better. We do have that yearning to have someone in our lives.

 

As for expenses, he is pretty expensive but worth it. Since we're both away for long days, we pay for a mid-day walk. We also pay for health insurance (for us, it has really paid off as it pays for a good chunk of his health issues that have developed and some emergencies). We actually moved from a condo to a house so he would have a backyard to pay in.

 

As for the stress - you do get it sometimes, especially in the beginning when they are training. Also when they are sick or there is an emergency, but the benefits have outweighed the stress. 

 

I would just think long and hard, and look at your budget, before you reach any decisions. Make sure you make the decision with your head and not just your heart.


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See "About Me" for details. All treatments failed. Not sure where to go from here.

#3 Beth83

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 07:51 PM

We got a pup after trying for about a year.  At the time we weren't entrenched in IF treatments or anything, had been trying though and sort of wanted to fill that void.  It worked wonders.  From caring for her to training her, to the extra outside time and love, I wouldn't think again.  It worked for us.  I might say if you are sort of in the middle of cycles or can't commit a lot of time to definitely think twice, but if you have the time and yearn to take care of something, a pup may be a great fit for you family - and a built-in playmate when baby comes.  Good luck!


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ME: 30 31 DH: 31
Married: 2008 TTC #1 since 2010
Diagnosed Mar/13 with severe MF - waiting for IVF w/ICSI
Natural BFP Dec/13!…Our Miracle...Sadly our Angel baby boy was born still May 7/14 at 23 weeks
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#4 impatient

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 07:58 PM

My dog was there by my side through three IVFs and I'm so glad she was there.  Yes, she is expensive and time consuming and we completely lost the spontaneity in our lives when we got her.  But yes, she helped me cope so much in those dark days.

 

It could have been an obstacle when we were applying to adopt because she's a big, loud dog, but actually it worked out really well because she and DD are good buddies now.


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Me: 41, DH: 44
TTC: since Jan, 2008 (age 34)

DH: Low morphology, low count. Me: Stage 2-3 endometriosis, non-functional fallopian tubes, small fibroids, low AFC, low poor responder ... anything else?

Jun 2008-Sep 2011 in a nutshell: One HSG, one very traumatic office hysteroscopy, one operative laparoscopy, three fresh IVF/ICSI cycles, one chemical, one early miscarriage, two tubal recanalizations, five IUIs (3 with Clomid).

May 2010 - Aug 2011 Attempted adoption application process through the BC MCFD. Aug 2011 Signed up with a private agency. On both waiting lists as of Apr 2012. Proposal through MCFD Jul 2012. Aug 2012 - Finally ... she's home and we're a family! : )

Adoption application #2 started Aug 2013. DD2 placed May 2014, finalized Feb 2015!


"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
Thomas Edison

#5 mouse

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 08:11 PM

I think it's absolutely natural to fill the need to love and care with an animal. I know quite a few people who've gotten a dog when their kids have gone off to uni (as well as gotten involved in volunteering) or split up with significant others to help fill the void so it's not just those who are struggling to build their families that look to animals for companionship. I rescued a dog (toy poodle) when I was living on my own overseas and rescued the dog we have now (a mini poodle-ish critter considered to be "unadoptable" due to health conditions) as a memorial (and way to fill the hole left) when my "old" dog passed on.

 

FWIW the "new" dog and the girl are best friends.

 

Fingers crossed for you!


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#6 rokgerl

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 08:13 PM

We have had our dog for 10 years, got her 6 years before we started ttc, so I can't really comment on the training aspect while ttc. What I do know is that my dog has been through everything with me - the losses, the successes, the fights with hubby over how stressful ivf is, and I wouldn't have it any other way. She has done wonders for my sanity and got me out of some of my toughest times by forcing me to take her out and about when I could have just sat on the couch bummed out. The unconditional love that comes from an animal does wonders for the soul. She may have some expenses but they're irrelevant. Her companionship makes up for it tenfold.
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#7 Diemtee

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 08:45 PM

Wow... I'm seeing a lot of support! I was expecting more no's :) glad to hear that your dogs have been therapeutic through it all. My husband has given me the green light, I just need to feel confident and prepared!
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#8 jojo10

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 08:50 PM

100 pounds of pure love. We had our dog before Ttc, he definitely absorbed some of the tears from heart ache, he was there for a needed walk when i received a Bfn and gained those few extra pounds from cycling. It is a personal decision and a commitment.
I wish you best of luck, and if you do get a furry friend I think you will agree with others, nothing better than that unconditional love.
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#9 lesley1978

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 09:13 PM

We had a dog before ttc, he passed away at 13 in sept 2013. In the journey we added another dog to our family, he is almost 4 now. We would not change a thing:) just make sure your ready for kisses and comfort, great companions! Keep in mind breeds that are kid friendly.
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#10 EMJ

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 09:34 PM

We rescued a little puppy and two days later we found out we would never conceive naturally. I credit my dog for getting me through those days. I was so busy making sure he wouldn't pee in the house or chew my shoes that I never had time to feel sorry for myself. His sweet face and wagging tail always puts me in a better mood. Dogs are definitely a commitment but so worth it.

On a slightly disgusting note, I now have three dogs and have dealt with so much poop and vomit that I am definitely ready for motherhood :)
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Me- 38, DOR
DH - 37, MF (morphology)
IVF 1- cancelled due to poor response
IVF 2- poor response, converted to IUI- BFN
IVF 3- finally made it to transfer- BFN
IVF 4- BFP!

#11 Diemtee

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Posted 09 February 2014 - 10:14 PM

LOL @ the above post about vomit and poop! Speaking of child friendly breeds of dogs, what breeds do you girls have?

#12 quandry

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Posted 10 February 2014 - 07:15 AM

Last summer, not long after a chemical, we got a puppy... My sil had also just announced her pregnancy... Having a dog was both good and bad. I felt sometimes lik he was a consolation prize. But mostly we just loved him. He was our second dog (already had an eight year old cockapoo). We don't regret it, but it wasn't always easy.
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See about me page.

 

 


#13 lesley1978

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Posted 10 February 2014 - 08:28 AM

Our old guy was a Siberian husky mix, a big suck and our 4 yr old is a boxer ( very active but loves my nephew..way too many kisses...if and when we get another I would go smaller:) maybe a chug or pug or boston terrior ( really just a mini boxer).

#14 jojo10

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Posted 10 February 2014 - 08:53 AM

Black lab, pretty relaxed personality and I TRUST him with my kids 100%.
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#15 OK4

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Posted 10 February 2014 - 09:31 AM

We got our puppy after TTC for 5 years. It was the best decision we could have made (for us).
The puppy phase is a lot of work, but we had a great time. Our puppy is 3 now and we have even talked about getting another one if the IVF does not workout.
So, for us having the dog is great!
Me 41 DH 42
Started trying in 2007
6 - Failed IUI
1 - Failed IVF
3 - Failed FET
4th FET BFP

#16 Tilly

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Posted 10 February 2014 - 03:24 PM

We got our pup after TTC for 7 years, and similar to others he is the best thing that could have happened to us. We rescued him at a year old so didn't have to contend with the training phase. We also purchased vet insurance straight away, and as he is an expensive pup it has probably saved us over $8000! It meant that we never had to make a tough decision about whether we could afford the treatment he needed. He keeps us exercised every day (which has been invaluable during some of the tougher times when I have not wanted to drag myself out of bed) and is just a bundle of unconditional love! Ours is a lab, and though I do not know how he would behave with a baby he is great with toddlers (although can get a bit upclose and personal with the face washes)!


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Me: 35 DH: 40
Married: 1999
TTC: 10+ years

Private adoption waiting list: April 2012


#17 BCgirl

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Posted 10 February 2014 - 07:00 PM

We got a puppy last year after TTC/enduring fertility treatment for 7 years with no baby to show for it. Our puppy has literally saved my husband and I from falling into a deep depression over our circumstances. She has helped fill a void in our hearts and has added life and laughter into our home again :)


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Me 37 Hx of Graves hyperthyroid
DH 46 Hx of Grade 4 varicocoele-repaired

3 IUI w/ Clomid 3 chemical pregnancies

1 IVF BFN
Fet x2  BFN

 

Trying to  accept child-free life


#18 rokgerl

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Posted 10 February 2014 - 09:27 PM

I have a beagle, a lot of energy, a little mischievous, and a slave to her nose but an absolute treasure. Beagles were bread to live in packs (for hunting) and so they adopt very well to the family lifestyle. She is amazing with kids and loves to just be in the mix with everyone. They do need exercise though and to have you watch their food intake (some people love their beagles way too much and it shows in their weight....they will eat anything and until their stomach is more than over full).
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#19 JacMac

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Posted 10 February 2014 - 10:51 PM

I wrote a response but I guess it didn't post. (Stupid Mexican internet). We have two "older" rescue dogs that we adopted at ages 2 and 4. They were both Mexican street dogs from Cabo that we adopted through an agency in Calgary that posted them on petfinder.com
We don't know what breed they are exactly by we call them chiweiners and they're 200% cute.
With them being older there was no puppy stage to worry about, just a slight adjustment phase, but rescue dogs seem to grateful and loving because they seem to know
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Me - now 36 Him - 37
Trying to conceive since our wedding day May 25, 2008.
Started Clomid Jan-April 2012.
Referred to RFP June 2012.
First consult at RFP November 2012.
First IVF cycle on antagonist protocol (GonalF, Luveris) January 2013.
Transferred two day-3 embryos, had severe OHSS, lost one twin between 7-13 weeks but was expecting one little one October 2013.
Found out at 6 mos that our little one had died weeks earlier and had to induce and deliver stillborn, July 25, 2013.
Something found on adrenal gland at follow up ultrasound, MRI showed what seems to be a benign tumor. Meeting with specialist Jan 8, 2014 - all fertility treatments on hold. :/
Tumour is definitely producing Aldosterone (causes high blood pressure) and Cortisol. Lucky me, only 34 similar cases recorded in the world! Tumour removed May 2014.
Approached about a possible adoption March 2014. Rush through all the paperwork and process.
Charlotte Evangeline born June 27, 2014. We brought her home on July 7 and held our breath for 10 days until she officially became ours.
Surprise BFP October 2014. Due to wonky cycles, ultrasounds convince Doctors I have a blighted ovum but detailed ultrasound reveals heartbeat at 6w3d. On progesterone support and waiting to see if pregnancy is still viable. Holding our breath again.
Adalyn Marie born on June 9, 2014 after a roller coaster pregnancy.

#20 BourneErin

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Posted 18 February 2014 - 08:58 AM

I have two dogs, both Boxers! They are a very hyper active breed so I would recommend maybe adopting one a bit older if you can't commit to the training ( I don't think I could now since starting our fertility treatments) They have been expensive but I am with the rest of you! They saved me and continue to do so. Boxers are energetic, happy, cuddle bugs. So their energy has forced me to get up and go when I just wanted to lie in bed, running or walking them calms me down and relaxes me. Their funny personality makes me laugh when all I want to do is cry, and they always know when something is wrong or when I have had a procedure done because they won't leave my side they cuddle up to me. I think having a dog is the best thing but it's important to remember that they are a part of your family and when I do have a human child to add to the mix I don't ever want to forget that my dogs are the ones that helped me through the darkest times and will continue to be my kids. 



#21 impatient

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Posted 20 February 2014 - 10:39 PM

We have a black lab too.  I trust her completely with DD ... even when DD smothers her or tries to ride her.  LOL  However, if I were to do it again, I probably would go for a smaller dog that needs less exercise.  I won't lie - it's really hard to walk a 70lb dog and a toddler at the same time.  I often feel guilty about not taking out DDog as much as she needs.  And when she doesn't get enough exercise, she barks more and scares all the neighbourhood kids.  Not the best for spontaneous play dates!


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Me: 41, DH: 44
TTC: since Jan, 2008 (age 34)

DH: Low morphology, low count. Me: Stage 2-3 endometriosis, non-functional fallopian tubes, small fibroids, low AFC, low poor responder ... anything else?

Jun 2008-Sep 2011 in a nutshell: One HSG, one very traumatic office hysteroscopy, one operative laparoscopy, three fresh IVF/ICSI cycles, one chemical, one early miscarriage, two tubal recanalizations, five IUIs (3 with Clomid).

May 2010 - Aug 2011 Attempted adoption application process through the BC MCFD. Aug 2011 Signed up with a private agency. On both waiting lists as of Apr 2012. Proposal through MCFD Jul 2012. Aug 2012 - Finally ... she's home and we're a family! : )

Adoption application #2 started Aug 2013. DD2 placed May 2014, finalized Feb 2015!


"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
Thomas Edison

#22 sharlene

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Posted 23 February 2014 - 02:38 AM

I vote dog - please try your local rescues - try to get an older dog - maybe 2 years old - a rescue can tell you about the personality - good with kids etc. Even breeds that are known to be child friendly can have a dog that is less so. A reputable rescue is there for help with behavioral issues that can arise and a rescued dog is forever grateful.

My bassets (very high maintenance breed as they shed, drool and are obstinate) were really invaluable to me in some bad times. They kept me moving and the unconditional love was just unmatched by humans!

Yup, dogs are an expense, work, and time consuming, but "mans best friend" for good reason.
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#23 s00n

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Posted 26 February 2014 - 11:12 AM

If you're wondering if you'll be able to make a longterm commmitment another option is to foster dogs - you live with them in your home while they're waiting to be homed. 

 

While waiting to decide if we were going to TTC again, or adopt again, we got a puppy (I hear you on needing someone to snuggle) and it's been a bit tricky with kiddo and puppy, but he's truly lovely.


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Him- Potential SA issues Me- PCOS like crazy/anovulation/long cycles. Started TTC before 30. TTC/Secondary Infertility(2008-2015) - Adopted from public system in Ontario 2012. Freeze-All IVF after OHSS, and successful FET 2015 @ 36Yrs Old.

#24 Bubby99

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Posted 04 March 2014 - 08:42 PM

I have so enjoyed reading this thread, DH and I have been talking about getting a dog for years and we always said we would get one while I was on mat leave so I'd be home with it, since that's not happening soon I've been debating adopting a rescue. While thinking about a dog we ended up with a stray kitten that a friend found (he acts more like a dog) and getting a pet has been the best thing for us, it so nice to come home to that little fuzzy face, our cat runs to the door to greet us with his tail wagging and it's made me smile more times then I can count. I think a pet is. Wonderful idea and it can bring so much joy to the home.
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Me - 37 38 DOR

DH - 39 40 (swimmers perfect)

TTC December 2010

Nautral cycle with clomid - too many to count 2012
Cancelled IUI - July 2012 (cysts)
September 2012 IUI mt Sinai BFN
Switched clinics January 2013 to Hannam
IVF #1
ER July 2013 - 4 follies 1 egg unsure.png 
ET July 2013 - transferred 1 embryo grade 2 7 cell
Current 2ww
Aug 2013 th_abfn.gif cry.gif

 

Sept 2013 Told IVF with my OE is not going to work cry.gif ...time to move onto to Plan B.

 

2015 Plan B donor eggs

 

 


#25 MEMac

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Posted 08 March 2014 - 01:22 PM

I have 3 rescue dogs and they have been a lifesaver for me as well, something else to schedule your day around, other than infertility. When you are in the dumps, they do something crazy which makes you laugh or give a face full of kisses. They need daily walks, which makes you get out of the house and exercise as well, a great way to relieve stress, lose IVF weight gain, and manage depression.


Me 35: Bilateral Blocked Tubes (now removed) & Diminished Ovarian Reserve (diagnosed at 32yrs)
DH 37: No issues
3 furry children (2, 8,11yrs)

TTC since May 2007
BFP Oct, Ectopic Nov 2007 - lost left tube

BFP Aug, Ectopic Sept 2009 - saved right tube

IVF #1 at VFC Apr/May 2012 BFN
BFP Sept, Ectopic Sept 2012 - saved right tube
IVF #2 at VFC Feb/Mar 2013 BFN

BFP May, Ectopic May 2013 - removed right tube

FET #1 at VFC - May 2014 BFN

MCFD Adoption - Info Session Nov 2014, applied Jan 2015, AEP Jan-Apr 2015, Home Study July-Sept 2015