10 replies to this topic

[amanda&marc]

Hello,

 

Just feel like I'm at a stand still here. My husband and I have been trying to conceive since January 2012. We were referred to the Ottawa Fertility Clinic (which I am not very happy with) in October 2012. After all the testing being done our conclusion is that my husband has a low sperm count and the reason is still unknown. We have seen the urologist and have had all the other test done for my husband to still get no answer as to why. What drives me nuts the most is that the RE was suggesting IVF before any results had came back!!! Nothing like pushing the fact that you would just like us to pay you thousands of dollars and just forget the idea that there could be other things out there that we may be able to do to help his count come back up?!?

 

In July I decided to go back to my family doctor to see if I could get referred to Montreal. My train in thought was that if Quebec is funding IVF that the RE's there wont be so money hungry and will be more willing to help us figure this out. Well I just don't think my doctor understood my concept and just kept telling me that montreal is just going to give me the same results and that we will just have to live with what we have been told. All she did for us is send us back to the same urologist but we will be seeing him at the hospital rather than the fertility clinic. Not sure if that will change his tune because it seemed like he was pushing the ivf before we had gotten results from my husband being put on clomid.

 

So recently I learned about shared IVF cycles. I am more than willing to do this since my husband and I can't afford IVF on our own and would love to help another couple struggling with infertility. It seems as though this isn't an option either since OFC does not do it. And most clinics charge more for a shared cycle.

 

I really don't know what to do... Parents tell me its my problem and not to bother other people about it?!?! Like what the hell??? Who tells someone with cancer its their problem?? 

 

I could rant on forever....

 

Thanks for reading my thoughts!

[Mollybean]

Hi there,

 

i am sorry to hear that you have been diagnosed with male factor infertility. i too am with the OFC and male factor is our diagnosis. Unfirtunately in many cases, there is no reasonable explanation as to why sperm counts are so low. If your Dh has met with the urologist and undergone semen analysis tests as well as bloodwork, then it seems likely they ahve ruled out anything physical (ie: varicerole vein) or hormonal. The only other 2 tests that were done on my husband were chromosomal in nature (karyotype and y chromosome deletion).

 

at the end of the day, we had no answers..everything was `normal` except for this crappy sperm count.

 

we were also advised to proceed with IVF/ICSI based on his numbers (less than 1 million/ml). It seems crazy that your RE would recommend IVf without having details on his tests results. upon receiving them though, if his counts are low then IVF will provide you with the best possible chance of conceiving.

 

there are many alternate therapies that you may wish to consider in the interim such as vitamins, accupuncture etc however they didn't work for us.

 

i wish you the best of luck with any decision you make. I have been veyr fortunate to have success at the OFC with IVF/ICSI and I wish you the same

[vball_gal]

I'm sorry to hear that your family doctor isn't really honoring your wishes regarding clinic referrals.  Some clinics allow you to have a conversation with an RE without requiring an actual referral as you are just seeking opinion on treatment and not necessarily treatment itself.    Make sure you have your husbands analysis with you so you have the correct counts etc.

 

One thing they should be discussing with you is whether or not IUI (intrauterine insemination) is an option or not.  It's a far less expensive method than IVF but I think the sperm counts have to be above a specific level in order for this treatment to have viability.

 

In the meantime there are somethings your husband should be doing to adjust his lifestyle slightly to improve his counts (takes 3 months for change in results): 

 

1) There is a vitamin made by Fertilaid that he can take

2) No more hot tubs or saunas - heat on that area = bad news

3) Reduce alcohol if he tends to drink (this was the tough one for my DH to alter lol)

4) No tight underwear or riding on a bicycle for lengthy periods of time

 

I'm sure some others will pipe up with some things they did with their DH's as well to improve counts.  It's unfortunate but with low sperm counts often times IVF is the only successful means which is probably why it was suggested to you right away :-(   We tried IUI 3 times with no success and it took IVF for us unfortunately.

 

Either way you came to a good place to talk because no one really understands what we go through but ourselves.   It's a shame your parents aren't more supportive but it happens and sometimes we just have to work around the environment others create for us. 

[JacMac]

Welcome!
I'm sorry to hear about your crappy experience. There are definitely things you can try to help in the meantime while saving up for IVF or exploring other treatment options.

Two books I would recommend you read are Making Babies and If At First You Don't Conceive. I've found them very helpful and informative.

By the way, I tell everyone about our infertility if they even slightly inquire as to why we don't have kids. I figure if they're going to ask such a personal question they deserve a direct answer. I agree that people are allowed to share about their other medical conditions or what ever little nuance their child developed each day so why can't we be open about infertility.

[GraceM]

I am sorry that isn't working for you.   I know Sandibeach was not thrilled with OFC and wound up getting a referral to Hannam in Toronto.  She used OFC for cycle monitoring and Hannam for the procedure. Perhaps you can find a clinic that does shred cycles and do this. 

[sharlene]

Hi and welcome to the site - although I know you would rather not need to be here.

 

As far as a shared cycle, my understanding is that the embryos created are then shared between two women/couples - are you intending to receive donated embryos or donate you (and your husbands)? 

 

I am guessing that the RE suggested IVF so quickly because it requires only a few good sperm - whereas IUI still requires a whole lot - and with a low count, it would probably be a waste of time.  Even though IUIs are much cheaper than IVF, it's still a waste of that money if it's probably not going to work.

 

Another thing to consider if you try to raise your husband's count and it doesn't work - and you can't afford IVF, would be donor sperm - you can do IUIs with donor sperm for much, much less than IVF and have a decent chance at it working, with a higher sperm count. 

 

You didn't mention your ages (or I didn't notice) - so, if you have the luxury of time, I'd try what the other women suggest in terms of improving your DHs count - and explore from there. 

 

Good luck!

[CathySchwenning]

I am sorry you are having issues with your clinic. I think we all experience some turbulence with the clinic we are at.

I have also been open with friends and family about our infertility issues. I know now who are there during tough times and I know who isn't. I figure the more people I talk to I meet others who have struggled and who "get it"

Right now, you have a whole forum of ladies who totally can relate to what you are dealing with. You are not alone!

[WaitingTooPatiently]

I will do my best to avoid an angry rant. I am in Montreal with male factor and I don't believe you will find a different response here. My husband had what I call a barely successful vasectomy reversal. Sperm production was restored but count, morphology, and motility are all below all the parameters required for any protocol other than IVF with ICSI. At every turn I asked about what could be done to improve my husbands sperm and was told  "nothing" some mumbling non-specific about hot tubs and saunas and vitamins, but nothing concrete and little interest in even monitoring for reduction in quality down the road. The answer to every question was ICSI and the sperm would be handpicked. I thought to myself even if you are handpicking fruit you will still water the plants, make sure they have sun etc.?

 

What I see is that no one is interested in Male fertility, there are over 18 Gynos at my clinic and only 2 Urologists though I would be confident in saying Male Factor counts for more than well over 10%. Is it because women are more driven to have children or men are less likely to follow difficult regimens. My husband gets sad ever time I have to get an injection or undergo some procedure, because I am not the one who is infertile (Must stress fertility is a couples problem regardless of what the causes are). It hits him harder than most I think because "he did this to himself". After what he went through for the reversal I know he would do anything, take any medication, follow any regimen submit to any procedure to permit me to conceive "more naturally". The science seems to have little interest in pursuing it. I don't mean to splash cold water in your face, but I have been where you are, shed so many tears over it. I am grateful that for me and so sorry for you that cost is an issue. I do hope that someday male factor is given the attention it needs so that some of the financial burden and heartache is diminished.

 

[JacMac]

I imagine there's more gynos than urologists at a fertility clinic because most of the procedures are done to women whether the infertility is caused by the man or the woman. I agree though that there isn't much information out there besides offering IVF or IUI to people. That's why I recommended the book Making Babies because the author admits at the very beginning of the book that many doctors are quick to prescribe ARTs for infertility rather than exploring and looking at the real root of the problem. 

[Beth83]

Hi there, welcome to the site and sorry to hear of your struggles. 

We are also diagnosed with severe male-factor and were also surprised when, at our first meeting, our RE suggested we may be looking at going straight into IVF.  It took me some time to think about how his reaction was so swift with just looking at our initial testing and DH  not visiting a Urologist yet.  The answer I came to was this (and please don't think I'm being insensitive, as we are dealing with the same type of situation and tough <expensive> decisions as you are):  They are reproductive specialists.  They don't mess around....when you go to them, they are going to try to get you pregnant the quickest way possible by taking the test results and numbers into account and giving you the straight & dirty answer.  If his count is too low to support IUI, then why even try it.  If his motility is too low, why try it wihout ICSI.  They take their experience in medicine and the numbers and suggest a plan.  Yes though sometimes it is the expensive route and not what you want to hear. 

It sounds like you may still be in a position to give it some time and try some vitamins, supplements and lifestyle change to try to achieve your pregnancy that route.  If that is the case you can refrain from any serious decisions regarding IVF and try a naturopath and acupuncturist, that type of thing.

 

Good luck with whatever decision you make and I hope you achieve positive results very soon!

[amanda&marc]

Thanks everyone for the replies! Just to answer some of the questions I am 23 and my husband is 26. He is healthy other than seasonal allergies, has never drank alcohol (hard to believe but I am serious! on his 19th birthday his friends were trying to get him to drink and he never has), never smoked or did drugs. His eating habits arent that great but he isnt overweight. I should also add that my husband paints school buses for a living. We did discuss this with the urologist and he didnt seem to think the chemicals my husband works with would be causing the problem. 

 

So I guess I never realized that I wasnt the only who got the IVF reply from the RE right off the bat.... 

 

I am at the moment trying to get my family doctor to give my husband a doctors note for massage therapy so we can work on his trigger points. I am an Equine(horse) Massage Therapist, so I am educated about how trigger points work and what not. If this doesnt work I will try and convince him to go for acupuncture. 

 

Oh we had also tried the Fertlaid Vitamins but he had taken clomid at the same time. The results came back as the count was down so we are unsure of which one caused the count to go down.

 

JacMac I will be sure to look for those books...