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thinking of starting process in Ontario

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#1 frostedlemon

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Posted 24 November 2010 - 06:31 PM

I am really new here, just discovered it a few days ago. My husband and I are just starting to look into the adoption process (we've been toying with the idea for a while now, but now we're ready to get started) and I had some questions. There so much information out there, which is overwhelming, yet it doesn't always address the small stuff.

I have contacted an Approved Adoption Practitioner in the area (Whitby) who does the home study and can assist in the actual adopting. She says she does an initial 2 hour consultation where she explains everything to you and it will cost $200 plus tax. Is that common? I know there are courses that you can sign up for, but the ones I've found are $85 per couple and if I would just be getting the same info as she would give me, I might as well just go straight to her.

This is maybe a dumb question, but if I go with her, do I need to choose an agency? Or is that instead of an agency? Or would/could I do the home study and then choose an agency to go with? I'm a bit confused about who all needs to be involved and how many different professionals are needed.

Do I need to be seeing someone for the home study before I sign up for the PRIDE classes? Or can I sign up and then find one? Or should I be doing both at the same time?

Do you have any tips or things you wish you would have known, or places to direct me?

Thanks in advance! I've been reading threads like crazy trying to gather as much info as I possibly can!

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#2 teejay06

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Posted 25 November 2010 - 03:28 PM

Hi there,

I know it's overwhelming at 1st. We are half way through our home study and PRIDE so hopefully I can help you a little.

Seems all SW's work differently. The 1st one we contacted offered us a 1st meeting with a fee like the one you contacted but had we of agreed to do our HS with her she was going to take that initial cost out of our HS total. The 2nd one we contacted offered us a no cost/no obligation 1st visit to chat. And lastly the SW we chose didn't do an initial appt just jumped right into the HS but we were fine with this since we did attend the "How to adopt" seminar put on by the ACO. So every SW is different and every SW will have a different fee, from $2300 to $3500. On that note the "How to adopt" seminar was very good we thought. They talk about all 3 types and will have guest speakers that went through it. We thought it was money well spent.

As far as the agency goes, it all depends on which adoption route you choose. If you go International or domestic private you will need to sign up with one but you don't need to do this until after you have completed your HS and PRIDE. I personally would wait to pick the agency because you might have an idea of what you want to do now but that could change fully after speaking to your SW, attending PRIDE and other workshops. So to get started, you just need your SW and then sign up for a PRIDE course. You can take PRIDE 1st, or during your home study but it has to be done before your home study will be completed.

The only other pc of info I found helpful is just read as much as possible, and try to attend work shops. The ACO has workshops twice a year the day before the ARE (Adoption Resource Exchange for CAS adoptions). The next one will be in April. We attended the October one and it was a great source of information. And lastly, the SW doing our PRIDE is from Whitby, and I would highly recommend him. He is really good and on the lower end $$$ wise. If you want his info PM me and I'll gladly send it to you.

I hope this helps :) Feel free to PM me with more questions!
[font="Lucida Sans Unicode"]Me: 29, DH: 36
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August 2010: Moving on to Adoption!!!

#3 kerrilyn


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Posted 25 November 2010 - 04:41 PM

Although I didn't end up going the adoption route we were considering it at one point and attended an information session with our local CAS. If you get "accepted" by CAS you can do the PRIDE training and Home Study through them for free and then take that to a private agency if you wanted to go that route (from what I undertsand). The downfall to going through CAS for the training is you have to wait for their scheduled classes, if it's done privately I believe it can fast track things a little more.

Good luck with everything.
Me (Kerri-Lyn) 41, DH (Steve) 37, TTC since April 2007Unexplained IF (possibly crappy eggs, AMH 10.4 = poor responder) - HSG, SHGx3, Lap, Cycle Monitoring, Recurrent loss bloods, EMB, Karyotyping, DNA Frag - all normal! 7 IUI's, 2 cancelled IVF's, 3 complete IVF's, 1 FET, 2 clinics, 1 early miscarriage, lots of debt, lots of heartache, lots of tears. We rolled the dice and got lucky on our last ditch "close the door" cycle and have a beautiful little girl. April 2014 - Had the crazy notion to try for another. Shocked with a BFP, miscarried @ 8W6D. See my "about me" page for more cycle details.

#4 geniegirl

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Posted 25 November 2010 - 04:47 PM

The PRIDE classes are really gratifying actually. It makes you realize that adoption is a powerful thing.....and as much as we need to be parents, there's little children out there who never 'chose' their situation, who have nobody, zero, except for a history of loss and a foster mom who may be caring, but who ultimately gets paid to take care of them.

We didn't choose infertility, they didn't choose to be born to a 'crack' mom who couldn't take care of herself, let alone a little baby.

Tonight is our 8th class!!! One more to go (the potluck night, yippee) and then we're onto finishing the homestudy.

If you call CAS, they'll send you a package and things will just roll along. They make it seem overwhelming on purpose I think to weed out people who want to adopt 'on a whim'.

#5 frostedlemon

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Posted 25 November 2010 - 05:08 PM

Thanks for your replies! It's definitely nice to know I'm not alone in finding it confusing. It's mostly overwhelming because it feels like you have to make these really major decisions before you even really know what you want, but I guess it's not actually that way at all.

I've looked into some PRIDE courses that are given locally after being told by the CAS that there's a two year waiting list for theirs. Thanks, I'll pay some money and get there faster. We figure that even if we don't end up adopting, the courses sound like a lot of good information for parents in general.

It sounds like all the courses have spots available, so we could actually get going on this pretty quick. Then we'll choose our SW and go from there. I'm sure I'll be posting a fair bit about it, so stay tuned! ;)

Thank again!

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"At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us." - Albert Schweitzer

#6 nervus optimist

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Posted 25 November 2010 - 05:27 PM

we're also in the process. we did pride and homestudy privately because it was faster, and it let us keep all the doors open (CAS, private or international adoption). we were told that if you do a homestudy with CAS you can only adopt through CAS, but private homestudy can be used anywhere. so in the end it gave us flexibility and meant we could put off some of the big decisions for a little while. the pride course did help us with a lot of the other decisions.

we didn't take an info course - we felt that we got the info we needed online, and knew that adoption was right for us - some other people do find the course, or consultation helpful.

some helpful websites are the adoption council of ontario and canada adopts. lots of great info on the process, steps, frequently asked questions, where to start etc on both sites. plus- you can always ask stuff here - there are people here at all different stages of the process (several who have already adopted once... or twice). canada adopts also has a forum section of their website so you can post questions there.

hope that helps to get you started... there is a lot of info out there, and a fair bit of controversy - best of luck in finding all that you need to make the decisions that are right for your family.

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#7 Ula

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Posted 25 November 2010 - 07:26 PM

We adopted our DS from Russia last year, brought him home August 2009 at 2 years old. Prior to choosing Russia we went to the CAS seminar, had their support person come speak with us about adopting through CAS. I also researched the private route, and international. In the end we choose international as it was the quickest for us and we could get a toddler. CAS told us that we would need to be more open to the age range (we wanted 0-18months), and private might take forever and the mother can change her mind. Internationl is expense, Russia is the most, Etheopia was the cheapest when we looked into it. In Ontario you would need to go through an agency for international.

If you decide on Russia let me know and I'd be happy to share our experience.
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November 30, 2010-U/S - 7mm, 120bpm (bleeding/spotting completely stopped)
December 13, 2010-U/S - 20mm, 171bpm (haven't bled since last u/s, YAY!)
January 11, 2011 - U/S - 65mm, 158bpm, NT .7 (major cramping, red bleeding off & on)
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EDD - July 20, 2011

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