Hi Kim2, Welcome!!
I know it's a tough road that we are on and unfortunately many of us have suffered through miscarriages, including myself.
If it's any consolation, I started my IVF journey at age 43! If I were 40, I would not hesitate to go for a round of IVF!! At least that's my personal opinion. But I do understand there are test that can be done to rule out chromosome issues and things like that. I never heard that the miscarriage rate is 40% once you reach the age of 40?!?!? WoW, that's high but even if I were to hear that, it would probably go in one ear and right out the other, haha!
I just had my second scan and I am 8 weeks and 3 days preggo and feeling all the symptoms one could feel, but the Doc said everything looks and sounds Great! Even heard the heartbeat, which makes it so much more real.
Don't give up, anything is possible... Thanks for venting to us... We are here for each other!!
Thanks for the encouragement! Yes, the OB at EPAC (the early pregnancy assessment clinic) at BC Women's told me the risk of miscarriage is 40% at the age of 40. Not great odds hey. She basically told me after my Trisomy 15 loss that it boils down to how many losses my heart can tolerate in the pursuit of a healthy baby. Not sure I have an answer to that. While I feel a lot more capable of dealing with this impending loss, it also hasn't happened for sure and so I'm likely tricking myself and will probably fall to pieces when it does happen. I 'should' be thinking more positively, but given my HCG numbers not doubling in over 2 weeks and a small gestational sac it's a grim picture. I tried to be positive last time and I ended up being blind sided and left utterly devastated. I also thought that because I was so lucky to have had two children that a loss wouldn't be the end of the world, well I was wrong. It was so incredibly hard. I pretty much checked out of life for a few weeks and that's not cool as a mom.
Wow, this has been really cathartic! Man, it's such a taboo subject that most people don't know how to respond to. It feels good to chat with others that have either gone through it or that understand what it's like to try and conceive a healthy pregnancy after 40. Thanks ladies.
I've been reading a lot of miscarriage and getting past that 8 week mark is a big milestone so congratulations!! Sending you mounds of baby dust.