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Helpless

Posted by Saphira , 16 August 2012 · 683 views

I am new to this site ...

I just discover a few months ago that I can not hope to even try to complete an IVF as I need first to find an egg donor by myself...
Me and my husband we moved to Canada a few years ago .We moved here to built a family as here , we felt there is hope for our children to come . There is a future.

We were both already graduated but we started again , from zero,  struggled  to build a new life and hoped that the child will come...
Time passed by and the child has not come ... and today I don't know where or to whom I can turn to get help.

We worked tirelessly  to built our new life , find the perfect home to raise a family, only to find we can not have children.

We are not rich, but financially secure. I went to Royal Victoria hospital and the doctor suggested that I should talk to my entourage, friends and colleagues and maybe, from somewhere , I will find a trully helpful hand.

I feel  that bringing even  the topic in our conversations , people started to feel unconfortable and started to avoid me like I had a plague instead of thinking how to help.

I feel helpless and confused...

Luckypenny

Aug 16 2012 10:02 PM

Saphira (((hugs))). Welcome to ivf.ca. Infertility can be overwhelming. ivf.ca is a wonderful community of caring, supportive, compassionate women that understand how difficult this journey is.

Where are you located? Is it worth looking into getting a second opinion from a different doctor?

- gibasgirl likes this

Saphira

Aug 17 2012 03:39 PM

Thank you so much for your support!!!!

I am in Montreal . I went already to two different clinics, the first time I heard this I coudn't believe it...Royal Vic is the second place...
I need to face the situation...

wngu

Aug 17 2012 09:56 PM

Dear Saphira, this is not an easy road and I wish you the best of luck. my advise to you is to take a deep breath and be patient ( I have learned that the hard way). This process can be very slow and nerve racking and you will face many ups and some downs. I am sure one day you will make the family you wish for. we are here for you

- Saphira likes this

Juliet

Aug 18 2012 11:58 AM

What an honest first blog

Welcome to a community that will embrace you and understand your feelings about so many aspects of this journey and how it can affect your life.

Keep the hope

You never know what can happen, even if you feel despair. You will have support here weathering any rough times and carrying you through to the times you've been waiting for.

Your strong relationship and being financially secure are godsends in this journey. With the ambition and focus you've put into your lives to this point, I'm sure will see you through to your greatest dreams. Hang in there!

- gibasgirl likes this

Saphira

Aug 20 2012 06:30 PM

Thank you wngu for the kind thoughts.

I feel time is passing throw my fingers like sand ...thank you for the '' many ups Posted Image

and only some downs...with more ups than downs I am sure I will find my way throw this difficult journey...Thank you for putting it like this..

Juliet, I believe that if you really want to share something with people , the only way is to speak your mind . Otherwise it is just lost time. and it is sad ....I believe in strong relation ships!

Saphira

Aug 20 2012 06:41 PM

I feel lucky to have you with me on this jurney and to share our thoughts. I fighted all my life for about everything I have achieved until now.. nothing came easy to me.
Your support is helping me to continue..give me the power to go further..

Hopeful IPs

Aug 22 2012 09:43 AM

Dear Saphira,
Thank you for sharing your story... we are in the same situation.
It was very difficult to learn that we could not conceive without the help of donor eggs.
We have had an unfortunate experience with a US donor agency, and are now considering other options.
We tried through family & freinds, but there were no suitable or willing donors.
We have decided to share our story on working with an egg donor agency so that others can learn from our mistake.
Cheers!

LillySmile123

Aug 22 2012 03:21 PM

Saphira, we are also located in Montreal
If you need a "local" shoulder for support, perhaps we can arrange to meet
We have had our fair share of ups and downs over the 6 years we've been trying to build our own family
Through it all, we have remained strong and committed to our dream
It's not an easy journey, but we hope for a bright end to the road

Saphira

Aug 22 2012 06:15 PM

Of course we can arrange to meet. It is very difficult....6 years is very long...I am so sorry to hear that .I thought people will be more open and more willing to help , I don't really understand why this is so difficult to find a helpfull hand .
What are the other options you now consider?

Myrtle

Aug 23 2012 07:40 PM

Hi Saphira-

I'm so sorry to hear that you need to find your own donor egg. Is there anyone in your family, like a sister or a good friend that you might consider? I know it is a strange thing to just bring up in casual conversation, but this is not a casual conversation.

This is serious, and I'm sure if you asked anyone they would take it very seriously. I think asking around is not what you want to do, you want to ask only people who are special to you.

Good Luck!!!!