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Hard to be quiet
Posted by
galfromaway
,
06 August 2012
·
478 views
There are days where I wish I didn't have to be quiet about our little creature. There are days where I would like to shout it from the rooftops that we're pregnant, that we (hopefully!!!) will have a new addition to our family this winter, and it's not another cat! 
My DH is the same way. Do we tell this friend because they're going through a rough time and it'd brighten their day? Do we tell my elderly great aunt and uncle? Do we tell more of our friends?
But we can't yet.
Not yet.
I'm 10w2d along. So far, so good, although there are moments where I wonder if things are really going well in there, even when I'm going through all-day-sickness symptoms, crazy sore breasts (and wow, where did these boobs come from??!!), tiredness, and the odd little twinge but no spotting. Part of me is tempted to ask for another ultrasound just to see what's going on, but part of me hesitates because... do I want to know? Is it not better to think "no news is good news?"
I know the next few weeks will fly by. Bloodwork on Friday, scheduled ultrasound on the 23rd, appointment with our ob/gyn on the 27th. We're farther along now than we've ever been, and I'm feeling pretty good all things considered.
It seems the thoughts I'm having are some of the same ones I wrote about a couple of weeks ago, and the answers still aren't there. The hope and possibility is there, but the undercurrent of uncertainty and concern that things won't go to term make me a little nervous. I don't like that I know so much, and I don't like that I don't seem to know enough yet. And the answers that would reassure me aren't available at this point.
Yesterday I visited my grandparents' grave, and asked them to keep an eye on us, to do what they could to help look after us through this. I asked my other grandparents too (although I couldn't visit their grave, as they're too far away). And I hope they have some way to help.
My belly is slowly starting to change. DH can see the increased curve now, and I feel like it's obvious to people that it's there, even though it's not.
It's also hard not to tell more friends. Me not having a beer when friends are around? That's not like me. We're going to Beerfest this coming Saturday, and I'm going to be relegated to the DD role. Which, again, isn't like me. I think we're going to use a story that DH and I played "rock paper scissors lizard Spock" and I lost. But the friends we're most worried about are ones who have been trying to have a family for the last 10+ years, and aren't able to have a biological child. They haven't had their "oops" like we seem to have. And I don't like hiding this from them. But I'm afraid to tell them at the same time. We're still going to wait until the second trimester starts, just like with everyone else.
I'm rambling it seems.
Things will fall into place the way they're meant to, I know. I just have to be patient, and look after myself.
My DH is the same way. Do we tell this friend because they're going through a rough time and it'd brighten their day? Do we tell my elderly great aunt and uncle? Do we tell more of our friends?But we can't yet.
Not yet.
I'm 10w2d along. So far, so good, although there are moments where I wonder if things are really going well in there, even when I'm going through all-day-sickness symptoms, crazy sore breasts (and wow, where did these boobs come from??!!), tiredness, and the odd little twinge but no spotting. Part of me is tempted to ask for another ultrasound just to see what's going on, but part of me hesitates because... do I want to know? Is it not better to think "no news is good news?"
I know the next few weeks will fly by. Bloodwork on Friday, scheduled ultrasound on the 23rd, appointment with our ob/gyn on the 27th. We're farther along now than we've ever been, and I'm feeling pretty good all things considered.
It seems the thoughts I'm having are some of the same ones I wrote about a couple of weeks ago, and the answers still aren't there. The hope and possibility is there, but the undercurrent of uncertainty and concern that things won't go to term make me a little nervous. I don't like that I know so much, and I don't like that I don't seem to know enough yet. And the answers that would reassure me aren't available at this point.
Yesterday I visited my grandparents' grave, and asked them to keep an eye on us, to do what they could to help look after us through this. I asked my other grandparents too (although I couldn't visit their grave, as they're too far away). And I hope they have some way to help.
My belly is slowly starting to change. DH can see the increased curve now, and I feel like it's obvious to people that it's there, even though it's not.
It's also hard not to tell more friends. Me not having a beer when friends are around? That's not like me. We're going to Beerfest this coming Saturday, and I'm going to be relegated to the DD role. Which, again, isn't like me. I think we're going to use a story that DH and I played "rock paper scissors lizard Spock" and I lost.
But the friends we're most worried about are ones who have been trying to have a family for the last 10+ years, and aren't able to have a biological child. They haven't had their "oops" like we seem to have. And I don't like hiding this from them. But I'm afraid to tell them at the same time. We're still going to wait until the second trimester starts, just like with everyone else.I'm rambling it seems.
Things will fall into place the way they're meant to, I know. I just have to be patient, and look after myself.
Saffy