IVF.ca Forums: This is very new to me - IVF.ca Forums

I have never blogged and most of the controls/commands on here are really foran to me, hmmm is there a cours I should take to learn this stuff? Am I that old?

I wish I would have blogge at the begining of my journey, I do have a journal from that time in my life. We started ttc 2002, got pg summer of 2004 turned out to be an ectopic pg, had surgery and was diagnosed with endo, severly scarred tubes that were adhered to both of my ovaries, it all made sence once I was told, the cramps, bad af, bad o pain etc. We had our first appt with an RE Oct/04 b/w, s/a & hsg done, next appt was supposed to be Dec/04 but I cancelled(too close to xmas, I was worried about road conditions) we had our next appt feb/05, agreed to start ivf, after a bunch of juggling and dealing with RE staff we were on our way to an ivf cycle......

IVF cycle started in May finished in june, we did gonal f for 6 or 7 days I forget, there were 11 follies and ER was done, it was horrible and only 3 eggs retrieved, we were devestated, talked with the embryologist all w/e and all 3 survived and multiplied, our clinic only allows 2 eggs to be transfered, so we had an 8 cell & a 9 cell transferred the other embryo was to make it to day 5 and would be frozen but it never survived so we have nothing left.

On day 10 post 3 day ET I did a hpt & got a pos right away, we were so happy but our pg was not to be a smooth 9 months, at 6wks we started bleeding, bright red heavy blood, thought for sure I was m/c, went to ER, they did a beta and it was over 50,000 so he agreed to an u/s, we saw 2 hb's, it was one of the most beautiful moments of my life, everything was fine, I was told to take it easy and wait it out. We were eventually diagnosed with Subchorionic Hematoma's eventually after many many bleeds they resolved and then a new complication was diagnosed, I had complete placenta previa, at 27wks I had another massive bleed and was taken by ambulance from our town to the city (2 1/2 hrs away) where I had to remain until the baby's were born. Our OBGYN gave me shots for lung developement and wanted to get me to 28wks, we managed to get to 34+ wks although had many bleeds in the hospital before my water broke at 34+wks, I was to have an amnio at 35wks to check for lung development, our OB wanted to deliver ASAP because of the Previa but my water broke before that and to be honest I was relieved, I was terrified about the amnio we had a c-sec jan 17 2006

Erik weighed 4lbs 15 1/2 oz, Matthew weighed 5lbs 1 oz, they were gorgeous! I remember the nurse brining Erik around the curtain for us to see and he was not happy, I remember to this day the emotion I felt, I couldn't believe it and all I could think was "he's real, they're real, I really do have babies, I finally have a baby with dh" it was one of those moments burned into my brain, it was surreal. While I was in recovery dh would go back in forth b/w me & the twins, he took pics and showed them to me, I remember hearing them cry and thinking " that is the most beautiful sound in the world, keep crying my boys" I was so amazed that they were here and I was no longer pg. They stayed in hospital for about 2wks, we came home Feb 5, we had been in the hospital since november, I haden't been home in almost 3months.

We came home, our 2 1/2 hr drive in the winter on a really cold day was not fun, I was a new mom to twins and was terrified. We made it in one piece, nerves frazzled but home safe & sound, dh made me spaghetti & meat sauce it was the best meal I have ever had in my life, after being in the hospital it was my first home made meal in a very long time, a meal I will never forget. I can remember looking at my twins and thinking now what, your here now what do I do? dh went to get dd(she was at mil) this was another factor, dealing with a troubled teenager while looking after prems, looking back I'm not sure how we survived the stress of everything, but we did, they did & dd did. It's not fun doing a 3 am feeding and not knowing where your dd is, getting a phone call saying "mom just wanted to let you know I'm safe but I'm not coming home and I'm not telling you where I am" it was so overwhelming. She moved in with her dad that summer and thank God she got back on the straight and narrow and has done very well.(she's graduated highschool & we just did a college application the other night)

So that is just a quick little update on how I got to where I am now, raising twins, they are 4yrs old now & while I have just paid for college applications for dd, I also just registered the twins for Juniour Kindergarden, it's really exciting. Every year they change so much, it's really amazing, every year my hair gets a little bit greyer & dh loses a little more of his hair.

I know that one day I'm going to want these young days back. Tonight I was sitting on the floor playing "the tickle game" that's what Erik calls it, "mom, can we play the tickle game?" how can I say no, so I sit on the floor and they run around me & I have to reach out with an arm and try to catch one of them, once I catch someone I pinn them on the floor and tickle them, they love love love playing that & so do I. One day they won't want to play this so I'm trying to enjoy these precious moments as they happen :Emoticons09710: