Help
Subscribe to rhonni's Blog
Leave Comment
Had some trouble there for awhile updating my blog. We are doing better since losing Baby G. I think the "aftermath" of the loss is much worse than the initial loss. I dont know. We are struggling to find some kind of new routine still. We are getting there though. Its still tough. Tears come at the weirdest times!!!! We went to see Shrek 3 and both of us cried a the end when they were showing the babies. Silly, I know but still. The room that was to be Baby G's room is still empty. Well it has my maternity clothes in it and the binders of cards and emails and the baby book, you know, stuff like that. That is all thats in there though. DH says we can keep it that way as long as I need to keep it that way. He is really struggling. He wont talk to anyone and he wont talk to me about it. He keeps asking me if I would try fertility meds again and I keep saying NO. He keeps asking about adoption and I keep saying you set up all the appointments and tell me when to be there. Do I HOPE I will get preg again? YES!! Do I THINK I will get preg again? No I dont.
Dr. T. redid my pap back on May 3 and it came back clear. He was really suprised. Apparently the dysplasia was really severe. He will re-pap me in November. Genetics came back clear on Baby G the only thing it confirmed was that he was male but we already knew that because we saw him. I would be 32 weeks preg now with 8 more to go. Sad, very sad!! This loss has really changed me. I find myself tryin to ignore it alot and pretend that it didnt happen, but it did happen. I am so glad I have his pictures. I got a locket made with his name and bday on the back and copies of his tiny handprints inside.
I decided that I would try and go back and pursue my jazzercise certification. My audition is this weekend. It has been really really tough trying to focus and concentrate. It could go either way. I could pass and be teaching as early as July or I could not pass and take a break for a while before trying again. Im not so sure it was such a good idea to push this. DH has been very supportive with it though.
My first period after losing the baby was wicked wicked wicked!! I think I was in the doc office 3 times that week. The next one after that came right on time like it was supposed too. I guess that is good. Ive always been very regular. Just like clock work.
Work still sucks!
Dr. T. redid my pap back on May 3 and it came back clear. He was really suprised. Apparently the dysplasia was really severe. He will re-pap me in November. Genetics came back clear on Baby G the only thing it confirmed was that he was male but we already knew that because we saw him. I would be 32 weeks preg now with 8 more to go. Sad, very sad!! This loss has really changed me. I find myself tryin to ignore it alot and pretend that it didnt happen, but it did happen. I am so glad I have his pictures. I got a locket made with his name and bday on the back and copies of his tiny handprints inside.
I decided that I would try and go back and pursue my jazzercise certification. My audition is this weekend. It has been really really tough trying to focus and concentrate. It could go either way. I could pass and be teaching as early as July or I could not pass and take a break for a while before trying again. Im not so sure it was such a good idea to push this. DH has been very supportive with it though.
My first period after losing the baby was wicked wicked wicked!! I think I was in the doc office 3 times that week. The next one after that came right on time like it was supposed too. I guess that is good. Ive always been very regular. Just like clock work.
Work still sucks!
Share This Entry:
