IVF.ca Forums: IVF.ca Forums -> Follow-Up with OB

Today is 3 weeks since I gave birth and delivered my precious baby G. Im doin better, but GAWD I miss him! Every Saturday, I say to myself I wouldve been so many weeks today. Im sure I will continue to do that until the Due Date.

I finally broke on down and went to see a counselor. It didnt work out. Im going to cancel my next appt with her. I did come to 2 conclusions/realizations on my own though from hearing myself talk to her and watchin her facial expressions. The first one was that no amount of counselin in the world is goin to change what I have been thru and no counselin is goin to bring Baby G back to me! He is gone!!! No one can bring him back!!! Just watchin her face as I was tellin her my story told me that she was not goin to be able to help me. Yes, its a very very sad story and Im sure she is very sorry for what happened, but can she change it? NO!! NOBODY CAN!! The second thing we talked about was medication. I realized that for the better part of the last 3 years I have pretty much been medication free. I thought, Ok...what have I been doin for the last 3 years. Well, I have been jazzercisin my ass off, thats what!! The exercise helped to manage my stress level and keep the depression away as well. So, the second thing I realized was that if I am not going to be on medication then I NEED to get back to my exercise routine!!!!

DH and I are plannin on attendin the grief support group next Thursday at the hospital.

I had follow-up with my OB on Tuesday. It went ok. He checked me out and said everything looked good. He said for me to be expectin a period very soon. I am kinda feelin crampy so Im sure it is right around the corner. He said that if I havent had a period in the next couple of week that I should take a hpt!! He said that he would really like for me to have a period before we start "trying" again. I just said Dr. T. we dont "try" anymore. We quit "trying" a long time ago. We just "dont prevent". That is just our way of lookin at it. Anyway, he showed me an article about a study that was done on women with elevated AFP levels. He said that while elevated AFP levels are usually an indicator of severe birth defects they can also be an idicator that something will go wrong with the pregnancy. That something is wrong not necessarily with the baby but with the "mother-placenta connection". He said that we both knew there was nothing physically wrong with the baby. We both inspected him. There was nothing wrong that looked like birth defects as far as either one of could tell. The probs that he saw said were most likely from the trauma of delivery. I think he was just tryin to prepare me to have no definitive answers from genetics. Then we talked about the pre-cancer cells that he found on my first pap. He is going to re do the pap on May 3 and if it comes back bad again then he will have to do the biopsy and we will just have to take it from there.